She heard him suck in a breath and had to smile. Immediate retribution was always nice.
"Camie, Caitlyn, this is our Joe," Alice said, gesturing towards Joe before she gave her a quick hug and a kiss.
Joe walked past Eric just barely missing another swat on the ass as he stood up to rid himself of the ice. She walked over and gave Nathan a big hug and a kiss and shook Caitlyn's hand.
"So, you're their sister?" Camie asked, eying Joe up and down.
Nathan chuckled. "She's mom's favorite brat, my pain in the ass sister, and Eric's bitch."
Caitlyn covered her mouth to hide a giggle. No doubt she already knew the whole story behind their family. Camie looked really confused and mom's face went completely red.
"Nathan Parish!"
"What?" Nathan asked, still laughing. Joe playfully swatted him.
Eric shrugged unconcerned. "It's true," he said simply. He pursed his lips up thoughtfully. "Actually, if anything I'm her bitch."
Joe sighed and nodded. "That's true. You are my bitch."
"Josephine!" Alice said, obviously fighting back a smile. "You're going to make them think I raised you like this!"
Nathan blinked. "You did."
"I did not!"
"Oh, come on, mom. No need to pretend. Everyone knows you raised the three of us to be foul mouthed little bastards," Eric said, egging his mother on.
Caitlyn laughed while Camie looked utterly confused. If Joe had to guess the woman didn't have a clue they were all joking. It only took two minutes after meeting Alice to know she was a down to earth wholesome woman. She raised the three of them with more love than anyone could ever hope for.
"So...." Camie began. "I'm really confused."
Nathan and Eric sighed at the same time. Joe decided to set the table and leave it up to the guys to explain their odd little family.
"Okay, I'll explain our little family dynamic since I get a kick out of it," Nathan said cheerfully.
"Oh, brother," Alice muttered with a fond smile.
********
Eric settled into a chair safely away from the woman his mother was trying to throw at him. He seriously had to question her mental status on this one. Not one single woman he dated, not even Beth, the woman he'd been engaged to, was anything like this. This woman was too focused on her clothes and appearance to know anyone else existed. She'd already sent Caitlyn a dismissive look and a look to his mother he didn't particular like. To top it off she wouldn't stop staring at him like she owned him. It was really annoying and a bit frightening. He was half afraid that if he turned his back on her that she'd brand his ass.
He sat back in his chair and let his eyes roam over Joe. He definitely hadn't missed the nasty look Camie sent Joe when she walked into the kitchen. His upbringing was the only thing that prevented him from tossing her out on her ass at the moment.
Women could be such bitches sometimes. Not all of them, but women like this one definitely were. It just pissed him off when women gave Joe a dismissive look because she wasn't dressed in the latest fashion and didn't pray at the altar of cosmetics. Joe was beautiful, hell, she was sexy in her own right. She was distinctly female and perfectly curved in his book. She might not wear the latest fashions, but she always managed to make his blood boil, probably always would.
He let his eyes roam over her hair that she left loose, it teased her shoulder blades as she moved. He nearly cursed when she took out an elastic and put it up in a messy bun, but she still looked good. He let his eyes run down her slender neck to the tight black blouse she wore that ended above her belly button. He liked that flat athletic stomach of hers. It was perfectly defined with a hint of muscle thanks to their job.
When she faced him, smiling, he licked his lips as his eyes took in her high firm br**sts, perfect for his hands, not that it would happen. He took in her figure, just perfect. Absolutely perfect. It really was no wonder women hated her. She was magnificent.
"Earth to Eric," Nathan said, pulling him out of his thoughts. Great, was he drooling? He sure as hell hoped not.
"Yeah?" he said, looking at his brother who simply rolled his eyes. "You want me to tell the story?"
"Knock yourself out," Eric said, dropping his head back to stare at the ceiling. No need to get caught ogling Joe again. She'd tease him mercilessly and tell him he needed to get laid. No doubt he did. It had been too long. Way too long.
After what happened the last time it was going to be a long time before he tried again, a really long time. That kind of shit really messed with a man's head.
"So, one day when Eric was eight, dad gets a call that some bully had not only beaten up his baby boy, but that bully made Eric eat a handful of worms," Nathan started.
"That's awful!" Camie said, looking thoroughly disgusted. It had been pretty gross, he had to admit. The worms weren't too bad, but all that dirt had been nasty.
Joe laughed once again, drawing his attention. He liked her laugh. It always soothed him.
"It gets better," Nathan promised. "I'm a year older so dad had me dragged out of class with the intention of having me beat the snot out of the bully. We walk into the office, looking for this big bad bully only to find these two scraped up and covered in mud. Dad demands to see the little boy who beat up his son and talk to his parents only to be told that this adorable little girl was the culprit."
"Hey! He started it by shoving the worms down my dress!" Joe argued, laughing.
"I had to do something to improve that ugly ass dress you were wearing. It looked like you were wearing a couch," Eric teased. Joe rewarded him by throwing a hot roll at his head which he caught and happily ate.
"Anyway," Nathan said, drawing back everyone's attention. "I, being the good brother that I am, offered to beat her up. Dad was at a loss, but still somehow managed to slap me upside the head when I offered."
"You did not!" Alice sounded horrified.
"He did," Joe agreed.
"Anyway, once dad decided I wasn't going to kick her butt we hung around, waiting for Joe's mother so he could talk to her. We waited two hours and she never showed. By then dad fell in love with the little brat," Nathan said teasingly.
"So did you, big guy," Joe said, sorting through the silverware.
Nathan chuckled. "Of course I did. I knew right off the bat that you were good sister material. So dad who was at a total loss and this big baby," he jerked a thumb towards Eric, "decided she should come home with us where everything could be straightened out. Mom gets one look at her and gushed and decided she was keeping her."
"So, you like, all adopted her?" Camie guessed.
Everyone except Caitlyn shook their heads. "Not exactly. Even though I think Dad mentioned more than once before he passed away that he was going to kidnap Joe and adopt her we never made it official."
"He would have to," Alice said with a watery smile.
"It didn't matter what the law says we all heard him referring to Joe as his little girl so it didn't matter," Eric said, earning a sad smile from Joe.
"So she never lived with you?" Camie asked, seeming determined to find out exactly what Joe's role was.
"She became an instant fixture in the house. She went with us everywhere, did her homework here, had chores here, but her mother wouldn't let her move in with us which was okay until she was about fourteen and then she started to sleep over here more often until she was living here and mom told us to go get her stuff. She stayed here until after she'd been working on the ambulance for a while and could afford to live on her own. I think she was nineteen at the time?"
"Yes," Joe said as she finished setting the table and started placing bowls of food on the table. "I moved out a month or two before Eric did."
"Only because you stole the apartment I wanted," Eric pointed out, stealing another roll.
Joe simply shrugged.
"Okay," Camie said slowly. "So Eric and Joe are like brother and sister?"
Eric and Joe shared a look of horror. Nathan winced and even Alice shook her head, looking like she might be ill.
"That's a seriously horrifying thought," Joe muttered. "Kind of disgusting actually."
"Damn straight," Eric said, saluting her with his half eating roll.
Chapter 5
"Eric, why don't you sit over here?" Alice asked, gesturing towards the empty seat next to Camie.
Eric kept his smile pleasant. "I'm fine where I am. Besides, I wouldn't want to interfere with your time with your friend."
His mother scowled in his direction. He didn't care. He came here to spend with his family and meet his brother's new girlfriend, not be set up with an ice bitch, who was now sending glares at Joe every time she thought no one was looking.
Seriously where the hell did his mother find these women? The last one she brought over had just separated from her husband and wouldn't stop bawling throughout the entire meal. Did she really think he was desperate?
"But-" Alice started to argue their seating arrangements.
"I'm already settled, mom. Everyone is. Let's just eat, shall we? This smells too good to let get cold," he said, gesturing to the platter of pot roast and large serving bowls of side dishes.
Camie smiled coyly as she stood up. "I can just move over there if you want. I'm sure your mother just wants to have a chance to sit next to Joe," she said, starting around the table to his side.
His smile became tight as he reached out and snagged Joe's arm just as she set down the large pitchers of water and ice tea on the table.
"Hey!" she said, slightly stumbling under his grip.
Eric ignored her squeaks of protest and yanked her ass down in the seat next to him. Camie paused mid-step, throwing Joe a glare that by all rights should have killed her on the spot.
Joe took one look at his expression and smiled sweetly, too damn sweetly. "You know what, if you want this seat I don't mind. I'd love to catch up with Nathan and Caitlyn," she said, starting to get up.
He put his arm around her and hauled her back down, keeping her firmly in place. Keeping his tone and expression light he said, "But you and I really need to talk."
"No we don't," she said, trying to get up again. She really was enjoying screwing with him too much, but after what he tried to pull with Greg last night she didn't feel too bad.
"Sure we do," he said, holding her firmly in place with one arm while he started spooning food onto their plates. "We really should discuss our trip tomorrow."
Caitlyn smiled. "You're going on a trip tomorrow?"
Eric said, "Yes," the same time Joe said, "No."
"I'm going on a trip tomorrow. Eric's inviting himself along," Joe clarified.
Nathan snorted. "Since when does he need an invite? You guys go everywhere and do everything together. I think it's pretty much assumed at this point that where one of you goes the other will follow."
Camie looked murderous. Joe seriously wondered where Alice found these women and thanked god that she never tried to set her up. The prospects were truly frightening.
Joe scoffed as Eric ladled gravy on her potatoes the way she liked it, perfectly in the middle with none of it spilling over. "That's not even remotely true. We have lives outside of our friendship."
Nathan scooped mashed potatoes onto his plate as he said, "Name one major thing either one of you did without the other present or a vacation or even a small trip you took without the other."
Eric chuckled lightly. "I've done plenty of things without Joe there and I can assure you I haven't been with her for everything she did either."
"Name one thing and I will give you each a hundred dollars," Nathan said smugly.
Joe and Eric shared a look as they both thought it over. Joe started with the big events in life, the simple things to remember. There was the time she lost her virginity, but Eric had been in the car several spots over doing the same thing so that didn't technically count. First kiss was out too since Eric was the one to give it to her on a dare. Driver's license? Graduation? EMT training? First job?
Shit!
"Oh, I got one!" Eric announced. "The night I got engaged," he said, looking at Nathan with his hand out.
Joe winced.
Nathan laughed.
Alice sighed.
Camie looked pissed at the mention of Eric being engaged to another woman, which was seriously getting creepy since she'd only met him less than an hour ago.
Caitlyn smiled sweetly.
"Pay up, sucker."
"Ah, Eric?" Joe said.
"What? We won," he said, looking victorious.
Nathan chuckled. "Oh, no you didn't."
"What the hell are you talking about? Of course I did," Eric said, looking and sounding confused.
"Ah, Eric, he's right. I was there. Remember?"
He didn't look like he did.
She sighed. "Remember the three of us were at the club over on Wilmington and you and I were dancing and Beth kind of had a meltdown about that and you jokingly offered to marry her to shut her up. Remember?"
Alice gasped. "You proposed as a joke?"
He shrugged. "I would have gone through with it I guess. She was a good cook."
"You guess?" Alice repeated in shock. "I thought you loved her?"
He winced.
"Eric Parish, do not tell me you were going to marry some poor girl because she was a good cook."
"Why else?" he said with a cocky grin. Joe rolled her eyes. The man really enjoyed teasing his mother too much. Not that it wasn't the truth. Eric didn't believe in romantic love, lust? Yes, but not the kind of love that lasted forever.