Liz barked her order to the cashier and handed him her card. “I know I’ve been encouraging you to get laid, but I didn’t mean with him. I don’t care how good looking he is. He’s a mental patient for f**k’s sake.”
The dreadlocked cashier raised his eyebrows, looking between Liz and me. Great. I dropped my loose change into the tip jar and marched to the end of the bar to wait for my drink, clenching my fists at my sides.
We sat down in the cushy chairs in the back, sipping our coffee. Liz’s knowing gaze never left mine. “Tell me what’s going on. Since you met him, you’ve become even more of a hermit than before.”
I ducked my head, sucking in a sip of my latte. Damn, too hot. I knew she was right, but I couldn’t explain the pull that Logan had over me. Maybe it wasn’t healthy spending so much time at the hospital. I almost laughed at the obviousness in that statement. But Logan wasn’t crazy. I knew that for sure. I also knew with absolute certainty that I’d be the one to go insane if our sexual chemistry got any hotter.
Each day I entered his room, he lifted me into his arms and held me tight before setting my feet on the floor. I couldn’t help but think that he was craving the physical affection after the weeks alone.
Dr. Andrews had seen us hug once and I’d instantly felt ashamed and embarrassed for letting myself grow so attached to a patient. Of course, it hadn’t stopped me from visiting Logan every day. I just tried harder to avoid Dr. Andrews.
Over coffee, Liz tried to convince me that I needed to take a break from my work with Logan, that I was becoming obsessed. When she dropped me off after coffee, and saw the embarrassing state of my apartment, I started to think maybe she was right. Stacks of textbooks, and a small mountain of notes had spilled from my overstuffed bookcase just inside the entryway, providing an obstacle to even getting through the front door. I had thought nothing of stepping over the heap the last several days, but watching Liz clumsily navigate it embarrassed me. I led her further into the apartment, where at least the sofa was free of clutter.
She tossed her purse onto the couch. “Seriously gal, you need to reel it in.” She waved her arms, motioning to the state of my apartment.
Despite any evidence to the contrary, my life was neat and logical. My piles of books and papers were concrete, things I could grasp. My kitchen contained only the essentials –coffee always left out on the counter and cupboards filled with cups of instant noodles. I didn’t have time for fluff, for boys and their nonsense, and certainly not for one I was studying who had baggage than a celebrity’s luggage cart.
But maybe my life needed the excitement Logan could provide. Things had gotten damn predictable: classes, boring professors, a drawer full of vibrators and romance novels dog-eared at my favorite scenes.
Still, against all common sense, I couldn’t seem to keep Logan off my mind. With the criminal case against him weakening with each passing day, and the likelihood that he would soon remember his former life, I knew he’d be moving on and I needed to let it go. Heck, it’d occurred to me more than once with how good looking and charming he was that he probably had a girlfriend waiting for him, wondering what had happened. Although in my opinion, any girlfriend who didn’t scour the city, search the hospitals, and jails and even under the overpasses didn’t deserve a guy like Logan. Period.
Still, it probably wasn’t healthy to ignore my friends, and my poor apartment hadn’t seen a vacuum in weeks. That realization smacked me in the face when Liz wrinkled her nose in disgust, weaving her way through my cluttered apartment.
“Okay, it’s decided. We’re going out tonight. Cocktails, mancandy, it’s happening. Because, this…” She gestured to the wreck that was my home. “Is concerning. You need to move past Logan, I know you think you feel something for him, but it’s only because of how passionate you are about your work.”
I’d told Logan I’d be back to see him this afternoon after my coffee date with Liz. I hadn’t missed a day since we’d met. Even though I didn’t like the idea of standing him up, I knew there’d be no dissuading her. Besides, one night out wouldn’t kill me. I could call the hospital and ask that they pass a message on to Logan that I wouldn’t be able to make it today. That way, at least he wouldn’t be waiting for me.
“Fine. I’ll go.”
She smiled. “Go shower. And I’ll do my best to clean this mess up just in case you get lucky and bring a guy home tonight.”
“I won’t be…”
She silenced me with a slap on the behind. “Oh yes you will. Now go.”
I took a brief shower and quickly shaved, unsure of what Liz might be doing to my apartment. Despite being cluttered with textbooks and papers on every available flat surface, I knew where everything was. I didn’t need her meddling with my system. When I emerged from the shower, pink and scrubbed clean, I found Liz sitting on the sofa, texting.
The apartment looked the same as it did before my shower. “Gave up?”
She glanced up from her phone. “Oh, yeah.” She waved a hand absently. “There’s no hope for this place. Just wear some damn sexy underwear, and hopefully the lucky guy won’t notice or care that you live like an animal.”
I sent a quick email to the hospital receptionist on Logan’s floor and dressed in jeans and a tank top. Liz helped me dry my hair pin straight and did my makeup too, and then I hobbled on my seldom worn heels to her apartment for some pre-drinks.