Prologue
Xander
My father is dead.
Jack Kane was one of the most important people in my life, and now he is gone. I am walking around like a normal person, but I feel anything but normal. I’m just going through the motions of life. I’m not living. I’m just not dying. There is a difference. I feel like part of me is missing, as if my spine were ripped and pulled out of me, and now I’m left to try to manage whatever I have left.
My dad is everything to me.
Was everything.
It has been a month.
How can he be gone?
Jack Kane was a strong man; nothing was supposed to be able to touch him, right?
That’s what I always thought growing up. He was formidable; nothing would faze my dad. He was the man I wanted to be growing up. He wasn’t perfect, but I never expected him to be. And he didn’t expect me to be a perfect son either, and God knows I wasn’t.
I was a terror.
But he loved me unconditionally, and he was there for me no matter what.
I can’t believe this has happened. I always thought my dad was invincible.
Surely, a man like him wouldn’t walk home from a night drinking at the bar, only to be hit by a man who had been drinking, but made the stupid, selfish decision to get in the car and drive, right?
The irony wasn’t lost on me.
I stare at the front door, willing him to open it and walk in. The house is empty, filled with memories, taunting me, reminding me of how things once were.
It’s a bittersweet feeling.
It somehow makes me even lonelier.
Just one more time. If only I could see him one more time. What would I say to him? That I was proud? Knew I was lucky to have him as a father? That I was sorry for being a wild kid, making his life hard at times?
I wipe my cheek when I feel something wet slide down it.
I can’t remember the last time I cried. I think it was when I was just a boy. I’m glad no one is around to see me like this—so fuckin’ weak. After putting all my energy and focus into comforting my sister, Summer, I’m now able to focus on myself. While my sister was close to my dad, she didn’t see him much growing up. She’d only really been in his life for the last few years due to her crazy-ass controlling mother. Me, on the other hand, I’ve been close to my dad since the day I opened my eyes.
He was my hero.
He was rough around the edges, hung around with bikers, and drank and swore a lot. But he was tough and had a heart of gold.
Now he is six feet under.
I stand and pace the hallway, running my fingers through my hair and tugging on the ends.
And then I make a decision.
For the first time in my life, I just need to leave. To get away. Be somewhere else.
I need to be free.
Does time heal all wounds?
I guess only time will tell.
Chapter One
Trillian
I stare down at the cake in appreciation. I think it’s my finest creation yet—chocolate on vanilla, circular in shape, and covered in chocolate candy. The cake is for my best friend and partner in crime, April. It’s her twenty-first birthday today, so here I am at nine in the morning, finishing off the cake I’m going to surprise her with, although it won’t really be a surprise. I bake cakes for everyone I know. I write ‘Happy 21st Birthday April’ on the bottom front of the cake in pink icing to top it off.
Perfect.
She’s going to love it.
My phone beeps with a message from her. Speak of the devil.
April: I love you.
I smile widely and message back.
Trill: I see you got my present.
April: It just came to the door! Seriously? You spoil me! Thank you. I love it.
I’d gotten her Ed Sheeran concert tickets and a chocolate bouquet delivered to her house.
Trill: Glad you like it.
April: Be at my place at six. Can’t wait for tonight!
I’m meeting April at her house for dinner, cake, and drinks before heading out for a night of dancing and, what would you know, more drinking. I’m not much of a drinker really. I hardly go out partying except for occasions like these, where April is involved and I can hardly say no. I’m a little on the boring side, at least that’s what I’m told. I’d rather be snuggled up with a good book than out shaking my arse on the dance floor, but that’s just me.
April is the complete opposite of me. She loves to go out and try different things. She pulls me out of my comfort zone, which I don’t always like but know that I need.
I’m in my last year of university, studying to be a kindergarten teacher, and I bake cakes or read in my spare time. That doesn’t sound like the description of an average twenty-one-year-old girl, but it’s me.
What can I say, I’m a creature of habit. Every morning, seven a.m. on the dot, I like to run. In addition to helping me keep in shape, running also gives me a chance to clear my head. I have a good life, but it isn’t perfect. My mother left me with my dad when I was seven years old and I haven’t seen her since. Apparently, being a mother and wife of a trucker wasn’t all that she had thought it would be.
When my dad died two years ago from cancer, I was left alone. I do have family scattered around the country, but none of them live close to where I live, and I don’t really want to move. My house belonged to my father and he loved it. I couldn’t bear to sell it or leave it. My dad worked hard to pay as much as he could on the house, so the mortgage is extremely low. And thanks to Dad’s insurance policy he left for me, I was able to pay it off completely. Between selling cakes, working part time at an ice-cream parlour, and the money in my bank from the insurance payout, I’m doing okay. Pretty well, even. But I’d trade it all just for one more day with him.