I stepped up behind her. “You sure you’re not feeling sick anymore?”
“No, I’m fine,” she called over her shoulder. “I just had a moment, that’s all.”
“Good.” I swept an arm under her legs and pulled her up into my arms. “Because I’m pretty awake. But I’ve got an idea of how to tire myself out.”
She dropped the clothes she’d picked up to clutch my shoulders, and her pretty little mouth formed a circle. That was all it took. No matter that there were hundreds of people downstairs, and we were in my parents’ house. I wanted her as badly as I ever had.
I walked her toward the bed and she said, “Garrick! The people downstairs.”
“Won’t hear a thing unless you plan on screaming my name. In which case, it might be worth it.”
She swatted my shoulder, and I deposited her on the bed.
“What if your mother comes upstairs?”
I knelt at the foot of the bed and slipped off her shoes.
“Then we’ll have another awkward occurrence to add to our repertoire.”
“That’s not even remotely funny, Garrick.”
I kissed the inside of her knee and said, “Do you see me laughing?”
She swallowed, and her eyes followed my hands as I reached for her. Her cotton dress was stretchy, and I slipped the straps down over her shoulders easily. It fell around her waist, revealing more skin to me. She wore a lacy blue bra that looked sweet and innocent, and damn if that kind of thing didn’t always do me in.
“Do you have any idea how hot it is to think of having you here in my old room?” She shook her head, but her tongue darted out to wet her lips, and I think she knew exactly what I meant. “It reminds me of last year.” How much it had f**ked with my brain to think of her as a student, and how very little it did to deter my feelings for her. If anything, I wanted her more. “Every class I was so tempted to ask you to stay after everyone left. Even though your friends were outside and anyone could have walked in, all I wanted to do was touch you. Taste you.”
Her eyes were large and dark, and her breath hitched. I kissed the side of her knee again and ran my hands up her thighs to the hem of her dress.
She asked, “Why didn’t you?”
“Because that wouldn’t have been fair of me. So I had to settle for my imagination.”
Thank God I didn’t have to do that anymore.
“And what did you imagine?”
I leaned over her and laid her back against the bed. Her arms stretched out across the mattress, and she looked up at me with wide, apprehensive eyes. It reminded me so much of the night we met, and all my blood rushed south so quickly that black spots dotted my vision.
I slipped my hands under her dress and said, “I imagined a lot of things. I thought about having you against the wall back behind the curtains.” She closed her eyes and fisted the blankets in her hands. “I saw you in that skirt you wore the first day of school with your legs around my waist.”
I hooked my fingers around her underwear and slid them down her gorgeous legs. “I wanted you in every seat in the audience.” She made a low noise and tried to sit up, but I braced a hand on her stomach to hold her in place. “I wanted you in every seat so that you wouldn’t be able to sit anywhere in that theatre without thinking about me.”
“That was already true.”
I smiled. “Good to know.”
She laid both of her hands over mine on her stomach, and held my hand tighter against her for a second. She said, her voice small and quiet, “I love you so much.”
I stood and leaned over her so that I could see her face. She blinked a few times, and I couldn’t read her expression. It was sad and happy and confusing, and she had never had this kind of response in bed before.
I didn’t know what was going on, but I could feel the panic rising under my skin, at the back of my throat, in the lining of my lungs.
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
She shook her head until her expression cleared, and then smiled. “Yeah . . . just thinking about the future.”
My heart jerked in my chest, and I tried to explain away the sadness and the fear I saw in her eyes. They didn’t have to mean she was having doubts. They could mean a thousand other things. But for the life of me, I couldn’t conjure one more possibility.
I dropped a kiss on her lips and said, “I did promise you forever. That’s a lot of future.”
She nodded, and then after a too long moment she smiled. “I’m sorry. But do you think we can . . . just go to sleep? I’m sorry. I know I said I was fine, but I’m feeling a little off after all.”
I took a deep breath and tried not to read too much into this. She’d been sick. It didn’t have to mean anything else. But damn it, now I couldn’t think about anything else.
As calmly as I could I brushed her hair back and kissed her forehead. “Of course. Can I get you something? Water? Medicine?”
She swallowed and shook her head. “I think . . . I think I just need some sleep.”
I nodded. “Of course.”
I folded down the blankets, and she slid between the sheets, still only half covered by her dress. I took another deep breath that did absolutely nothing to relieve the pressure in my jeans or the pressure in my head.
I kissed her cheek one more time.
“I love you,” I said, slowly, deliberately. I needed her to hear that through whatever noise might be happening in her head. “Get some sleep. I’m just going to go take a quick shower.”