Do I do that?
I think back to Richard only moments ago. Would I have given in and said yes just to avoid hurting his feelings?
Maybe.
Shit, I am a pushover.
“And what if I was interested?” I ask, staring Zach straight in the eye.
“In Xander?” he asks with his mouth dropping open.
“If you repeat this conversation, I will kill you in your sleep,” I growl, leaning over the counter.
Zach rubs the back of his neck with his free hand. “Fuck, Trill. He’s just passing through, and you aren’t a casual kind of girl.”
I’m really not. But I’ve also never wanted someone the way I want Xander. I sigh and lean on my elbows. “It doesn’t matter. Fine, I’ll hang out with Xander tonight.”
“Wait a minute, you wanted Xander? And then I set him up with that…” he trails off, scowling.
“It’s fine,” I say. “I just thought he was good-looking. No big deal.” I try to play it off.
“Why didn’t you say something, Trill? Shit, I’ve brought so many of my brothers around you and you didn’t even bat an eyelash. How was I supposed to know who would catch your interest?”
I stand up straight. “Doesn’t matter.”
Zach is still staring at me, wide-eyed. “In the years I’ve known you, you’ve never, ever, even fuckin’ once admitted to liking someone even a little bit. It does matter.”
I decide to be blunt. “Like you said, he’s just passing through and he’s already found someone to keep him busy while he’s here, so please, just forget we ever had this conversation.”
“Fine,” he mumbles. “Now I feel like shit.”
“Well, don’t,” I reply. “I’m obviously not his type anyway, and that’s okay.”
I’m his Richard, if that makes sense.
“What the fuck do you mean, you’re his Richard? Are you crazy?” Zach snaps at me.
Shit, I didn’t mean to say that out loud.
My boss decides to walk in at that moment. She smiles at Zach and tells me I can clock out. Zach follows me to my car, muttering under his breath the whole way. I unlock the door and open it.
“See you at home.”
“Trill—”
I turn to him. “Please don’t embarrass me with this.”
“Fine,” he says, holding the door open for me to slide in. Before he shuts it, he leans down and says quietly, “You deserve the best, you know that, right?”
I puff out a breath. “See you later, Zach.”
He closes the door and I drive home.
Chapter Five
Xander
“If you’re busy tonight, that’s cool. I didn’t expect you to drop your life when I came here,” I tell Zach, who is playing a video game.
“I have some shit at the clubhouse I need to be there for, but Trillian said she would come over and take you out somewhere,” he replies, staring at the screen.
I clear my throat. I had wanted to ask more about her all day, but was waiting for an opening. “So the two of you never hooked up?” I ask.
Zach pauses the game and turns to me. “No, we don’t see each other like that. We’re good friends. Family even.”
I run my teeth along my bottom lip. “It’s just that last night, I thought she was yours. I know you said she wasn’t, so I thought it was casual or something.”
“She’s not casual,” he replies, a thoughtful expression on his face. “As long as I’ve known her, I’ve never seen or heard of her hooking up with anyone. She gets asked out, maybe even goes on a date or two, but that’s about it.”
“My mistake,” I reply.
My huge fucking mistake.
She isn’t going to look twice at me now.
“You like her, don’t you?” Zach asks.
I look away. “She’s beautiful, of course…”
“Why didn’t you fucking say something last night?” he growls, looking angry.
I sit up straighter. “When was I going to say something? When you were all over her? Or when your dad was giving me threatening looks and telling me how she’s such a good girl?”
Zach cringes. “I wasn’t all over her, and yeah, Dad’s protective, but he’ll get over it.”
“You were all over her.” And I didn’t fucking like it.
“Why the fuck would you go home with that girl if you liked Trillian? That’s fuckin’ stupid.”
I look at my friend, and for the first time since we were kids, I want to strangle the shit out of him. “I thought you and she had a thing, your dad silently threatened me, and I’m just passing through and have nothing to offer except a quick fuck. Pick one, Zachary.”
“Shit, no need to full name me,” he mutters.
“Why does it seem like you want me to hook up with Trill?” I ask, suspicious.
He resumes the game and continues to play. “You’re a good man, Xander. She could do a lot worse.”
Well, this good man left with another woman last night and ruined his chances.
“Thanks, I think. Not that it matters now.”
Zach flashes me an odd look. “I guess not. Do you want her number? Or will you just go next door?”
“Are you sure she wants to hang out with me?” I ask. Maybe she doesn’t even care that I left with Paula last night. Zach said she didn’t usually pay attention to any men. Why the hell would I be any different?