"Cade seems like the kind of guy who can take care of himself," I said.
"He can," she said. "But the last time he was involved in club business, it nearly destroyed him."
"Well, I don't know about biker clubs," I said. "But I do know a bit about brotherhood. And loyalty."
"You're close to your brothers," June said.
I laughed, the sound bitter. "I was talking about my unit," I said. "EOD. Explosive -"
"I know what it is," she said. "Explosive Ordnance Disposal. You were in the Navy."
"Yep."
"I was too, once upon a time," she said. "Cade was in the Marines." She paused. "Funny how the people who aren't even your blood become family, huh?"
And how the people who should be the closest in the world to you were the furthest away, I thought.
"Are you going to go after her?" June asked. It took me a minute to switch gears, to even register she was talking about River.
"Why should I?" I asked. "She made it clear what she thought of me in her note."
"Thought you said the note was nothing important," June said.
"Nothing that matters," I said. "She said what she thought. Said there was an expiration date on us."
June looked thoughtful. "Huh," she said. "She seemed so sincere."
"Guess she's a really good actress," I said.
"Champagne?" The flight attendant paused at my seat.
"Please," I croaked, my voice hoarse. When she returned, I took the glass, my hand trembling, and downed it in one gulp.
The flight attendant paused. "Another?" she asked, and I nodded. "Ms. Andrews?"
"Yes?" I whispered. I looked at her from underneath my sunglasses. I knew I looked pretentious, but I was beyond caring now. My head was pounding.
"Let me know if there's anything else you need," she said. "My daughter is just your biggest fan. She'll be thrilled to know that you were on my flight."
I forced a smile. "Would she like an autograph?"
The flight attendant beamed. "That would be wonderful," she said. "I'll get a pen."
I drifted through the rest of the flight, thinking about Elias. I felt like someone punched me in the stomach, my guts tied up in knots at the thought of going back to my old life.
It was cruel the way life worked sometimes, showing you how things could be, giving you a momentary glimpse of happiness...and then yanking it away once you'd tasted it.
I didn't know how I could go back to my old life.
I didn't know that I wanted to go back to it.
Part III
“Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true.”
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
24
"You've been moping around here for the past two weeks now," Silas said. "Showing up at the bar and shit. You don't even f**king drink anything, just scare people off with your motherfucking depression."
"Fuck you," I said. "You're a f**king bouncer. Scaring people off is a good thing."
"You even going to tell me what she f**king said?" he asked. "You're so goddamn cryptic about it. You don't say anything about it. I have to find out on one of those gossip sites that she even dumped your f**king ass."
"Nothing to tell," I said. "It happened like you said it would."
"Well, f**k that bitch, then," Silas said. "I mean, I wouldn't want to look at your ugly mug, but still, f**k her."
"I don't want to f**king talk about it anymore," I said. "You gone out to mom's lately? Got anymore conspiracy theories about what's going on in this town?"
"I still f**king maintain that shit wasn't an accident," Silas said. "But I'm leaving it alone. If mom whacked the ass**le over the head with a rock, more power to her. He deserved it."
"Glad to hear you're finally being reasonable," I said. "Now if you can just convince mom to be reasonable."
"About what?"
"I don't know," I said. "She's got some kind of offer on the land. Wouldn't show me the paperwork. I told her she needed to show it to a lawyer, see if it's a fair deal."
"This is what I'm talking about," Silas said. "He dies, and she gets an offer on the property?"
I sighed. "They're not related, you moron," I said. "That developer is trying to buy up lots of property around here, some mining company or shit. Don't you read the shit they put out- the notices and bullshit?"
"Fuck, no."
"You want to go by mom's this weekend?" I asked. "See if maybe you can talk some sense into her, get her to at least consider whatever they're offering her for the property. I'm worried she's going to miss the opportunity to cash that hellhole in for what she can get, and then she'll have nothing. I'm sure she's got nothing."
A dark look crossed Silas' face. "Can't this weekend," he said.
"What, you got some better shit going on?" I asked. "Don't even try to bullshit me, I already asked Roger and he said you're not bouncing this weekend."