“Number one. We both agree I haven’t seen this part of you before?”
“Not unless you’ve been checking me out in my sleep.”
“And give you another reason to be traumatized? No, thank you. All I’ve done is hold you.”
“Well, let’s go to the field for the call.” I twisted at the waist, rolling my h*ps closer to him and my head the opposite way. Sure enough, there was a freckle right next to where his finger rested.
“One for one.”
I was going to roll back, but his hand crept up my tank along the back. I loved the feel of his thumb pads against my skin, so smooth and soft from whatever moisturizing hand soap he used to clean his hands all day. I knew the spot he was focusing on, just to the left of my spine, halfway down.
“Number two,” he said, and I reluctantly nodded, wishing he had taken longer to get there. His hand swept to my hipbone and I finally rolled myself back down. Quietly, seductively, he teased, “You know where I’m going for that third freckle, right?”
I pinched my eyes, my sleek gaze piercing his. I did know where he was going next, and my insides began to purr with anticipation.
He climbed over me, picking up his kisses just above my shorts. His hands slid until they found the bottom hem of my tank. He pushed it slowly north, a kiss for every inch of my stomach revealed. A little farther, a little farther… “Hello, number three,” he said, pushing my shirt up those last two inches, revealing a tiny brown freckle right below my nipple, and soon his languid tongue was licking its way to the peak of my breast. A fury erupted below my belly, my legs stiffening so much they locked in place.
He didn’t bother rubbing it in that he’d won, that he had called three for three, proving without a doubt in his mind that I was Claire. His mouth just went to work pleasuring my newly exposed area, continuing the mission I’d set him on originally, and the electric shocks shooting through my veins picked up right where they left off.
My breaths quickened as his hand worked the swell of one breast and his mouth the other. I was so caught up in the moment, it barely registered that his hand was also caressing the part of my left breast that was burned. I spasmed erratically, tingles exploding down below like popping firecrackers. I had to squirm, had to wrap my legs tightly around his h*ps in a death grip, had to open my eyes to watch him go after my breast like it was his favorite flavor of ice cream.
I threw my head back. This was what I wanted. To be touched in such an arousing, pleasurable way, filled with such sensations that I’d never allow their horrible predecessors to haunt me again. To be devoured eagerly by Nick.
My fingers combed through his hair, roughly, tugging the ends with each sweep…more so when he sucked me really hard. I loved it, and the more I moaned and squirmed beneath him, the harder he nibbled.
My hands went lower and I pinched the material hiding his shoulders. I wanted the damn shirt gone so I could feel the warmth of his flesh against mine. I tugged it towards me, but there was no way in hell it was going anywhere without his help. He granted my silent request, pulling it over the back of his neck and tossing it to the floor. Crawling towards me, his mouth sucked at my jaw line. His hand abandoned my br**sts to the cool air, and very slowly, very lightly, his fingers tickled their way down, down, down. And when he began to rub me back and forth between my legs, my eyes were ready to roll into the back of my head. I moaned, long and sing-song. I really, really wanted him to go there. I hitched my leg higher around his waist and his hand slid up the back side of my shorts, then followed the hem around my thigh until he pressed down between my legs.
Whispering hotly in my ear, he asked with a deepened voice, “Do you want me to touch you here?”
I licked my lips and nodded my answer, the muscles around his hand twitching with anticipation. At first he rubbed me through my shorts, but when his finger weaved through the folds and penetrated my insides, he paused the neck assault to admire his handiwork – my widened eyes, my dropped jaw, the way I moaned in ecstasy, and the wave I made as a tingling sensation repetitively rippled the length of my body. Chuckling, he added a second finger and watched the show all over again, this time with the addition of my hands flailing back to grab the headboard for support against the tremors raging where his hand continued to propel in and out.
He leaned some of his weight on top of me, his free arm pressing heavily against my wrists where they connected with the bed, pinning me down easily, intensifying the assault between my legs. He bit the tip of my nipple and flicked his tongue a few times, and I actually let out a tiny scream, which he enjoyed way too much.
“God, I want to suck on you down there.” It was so hot the way he said that, his eyes dark and seductive as his lips returned to sucking my breast, French kissing the nipple held captive within. “Can I?” he squeezed in between love bites. I wanted that tongue between my legs so bad.
And at the same time I wanted to kill him, because what had started off as me just needing to be touched in the right way by the right guy, had turned into desperation for that affection. I didn’t care what he wanted. If he asked me to perform the kinkiest position in the Kama Sutra right now, I’d do it without hesitation or risk of humility. Because I wanted Nick that badly.
And he knew it.
It was the hardest yes I’d ever said, or moaned in this case, knowing how much power that one little word just gave him.
I wasn’t quite sure what he was doing as he slid past my body onto the floor at the foot of the bed. But once he snagged my feet and pulled me towards him, I figured it out. My cheeks were flushing as he pulled my shorts past my ankles. Kneeling on the floor, he pulled on my legs until my knees draped over his shoulders.
I was utterly embarrassed. Given my past, I should’ve been completely horrified over the vulnerability of being in that position, but something about the way Nick’s hands slid gently across my skin made all that embarrassment just slip away. And once his tongue went to work, I couldn’t control the intensity of my moans any longer. Even though he was going slow and barely licking as of yet, my body exploded with spine-tingling spasms. His arms had wrapped around my h*ps and his hands secured my inner thighs apart, refusing my body’s attempts to thrust about. His assault intensified, as did my moaning. Only once I came did he release me, and I lay there exhilarated, not caring that I remained in the most awkward of positions, my damaged skin out there for him to see.
He dropped my legs and climbed over me, bringing that ever-pleasing tongue to mine. He had my tank pulled off in an instant, and the bare skin of our chests were suddenly flush. I yearned for that last piece of clothing between us to go as well, but the moment I slid my hand beneath the band of his boxers, he murmured, “Uh-uh,” and imprisoned my hands above my head.
He reduced the intensity of our kisses until my hormones relented and my legs began to slacken their grip around him, collapsing to the bed from exhaustion. I think he continued to kiss on me until I finally fell asleep, but I was in such a euphoric daze I couldn’t say for sure.
15
It was weird how quickly I had become accustomed to Nick’s body pressed against mine as I slept, because I always seemed to waken once the heat his body had supplied mine dissipated. And it was no wonder I was cold, as I was butt-naked beneath the sheet of silky cotton.
I almost didn’t care that I was alone. My pillow smelled of Nick’s body wash, and it was heavenly. But still, having him actually in bed with me was far better.
My insides were still humming happily down below when I threw the cover off my skin. For the first time since my life went to shit, I actually felt sexy in my damaged skin, and didn’t think twice about ditching the tank and shorts and just wrapped myself up loosely with the silk robe.
Stepping softly, I lightly dragged my fingertips along the wall to guide me down the hall. Shades of gray and black finally appeared as I neared the living room. It was hard to see, but I thought I saw Nick’s head rolled back over the armchair. I quietly made my way over, thinking he was asleep, but was surprised to find him awake, a tiny glint of light shining off his eyes.
But even in the darkness, I could tell by the angles and curves on his face that something was seriously wrong.
“Nick?” I whispered, slightly worried. “What’s wrong?”
A puff of air shot from his nose like a bull. He shook his head and finished the beer in his hand, the glass thunking when it dropped to the floor afterwards, clanging into at least one more bottle already disposed. When he sighed and tilted his head in my direction, my heart panicked over his delay in speech.
Then I wished I had never asked in the first place.
“Why didn’t you tell me about the cut marks?”
Fuck. Fuck! My body was so focused on the pleasures that I completely forgot about the damage to my body. The burns he knew about, the cuts, however, I had kept to myself. But his lamps were three-way. He would’ve had to cycle through the brighter settings to turn it off. And since he didn’t say anything while it was dim, he must’ve noticed when he cycled through, my naked, sleeping body lying there right beside him. My cuts would’ve been so obvious.
“Did you really think you could keep that from me?”
“No,” I said quickly, dragging the word out longer than necessary. “I just… I…” I closed my eyes, unable to find the right words. “Please don’t be mad.”
“Don’t be mad?” he snapped, arcing towards me. “My girlfriend gets f**king kidnapped, brainwashed and sold to some shithead who f**king rapes and cuts her every damn night!”
My eyes cringed shut when he started yelling at full lung capacity. “I think I have the right to be f**king mad! Do you think this is easy for me? To know I wasn’t there to protect you? To know that for every day I was off learning some stupid new culinary skill, that you were being drugged and threatened and raped? He had his hands on MY GIRLFRIEND! And then by some miracle, you not only escape but find your way back to me. And I’m just supposed to pretend everything’s alright now? How the hell are either one of us suppose to do that?”
His voice collapsed on him next. “How can you not resent me for not finding you? For not protecting you better?” He practically choked when he added solemnly, “Why would you even want to be with someone that’s already failed you?”
My face long smothered with tears, all I could do was jump on his lap and throw my arms around him. Whether he felt he deserved me or not, I wasn’t going to let him fall apart on me. Not now. Not ever. I didn’t want to move forward without him.
To my relief, his arms wrapped around me too, and I felt the tug to my roots when he fisted my hair. Through tears and a raspy voice, he cried, “I am so sorry, Megan. I should’ve protected you better.”
My throat thick with mucous, my voice was barely audible. “It’s not your fault. You wouldn’t have been driving me to school even if you were still in town. I was the stupid one. It’s my fault I was taken.”
“No. You were young. Innocent.”
“So were you,” I defended. “And I know you did everything you could to find me. You had to go on with your life. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t be able to take care of me right now.”
“But that shouldn’t have happened to you. And I’m glad you burned that motherfucker to the ground. I only wish I could’ve been there to do it with you.”
The grip he had on my ribs practically suffocated me now, but I didn’t care. It was secure and somewhat comforting, even with the difficulty breathing. “It’s over now. I just want to move on. With you.”
He gave me a shaky nod. We held each other tightly until our unsteady chest heaves calmed and our tears ran dry. He grabbed my face with both hands and gave me his most passionate kiss yet.
“I love you, Megan.”
I felt another tear drop. “I think I love you, too. No, wait…” I paused, tipping my head at an angle. Did I really just say think?
Did I love him? I knew it seemed fast, but I had been with him twenty-four-seven for practically a month now. Twenty-nine days. Seven hundred and two hours. Watching him, getting to know him, aching to bring my body closer to his, finally getting to kiss him. Was it me on the border of falling in love, or was it something deep within that was tapping into it? Something lingering from the days of Claire, maybe recognizing and reaching for the soul it once connected with?
Because I kind of felt like I did love him. And I couldn’t deny all the things he’d done to prove his love for me.
Nick’s chuckle was as soft as a whisper, and his hands surrounded my face to bring my eyes back to his. “That’s alright. Given the circumstances, I’ll happily accept that.”
We smiled in the darkness and brought our lips together again. The way his hands slipped down to caress my hips, along with the deep succulent kisses, made me wet again, and I was suddenly aware of how exposed I was, sitting in his lap in nothing but a robe with silk ties that had completely loosened from our embrace. Tingles exploded between my legs and my body screamed for me to let him take me.
I pulled from the kiss and buried my forehead in his neck. “Can I ask you something that’s been weighing on my mind?”
“Anything.” His hand gently brushed through my tangled hair.
“You said we started dating when I was a sophomore. Did we ever have sex?”
He chuckled lightly and I sensed a much-needed smile spreading across his face. “Yeah. But the first year, we just fooled around with o**l s*x.”
“Which explains why you did it so well earlier.”
His amusement growing, he let loose a real laugh this time, and my insides got chills when I remembered how his eyes seduced me when they looked up from between my legs earlier. “Well, I’ve had plenty of experience finding your sweet spots, you just don’t remember it. Shortly after your sixteenth birthday, your parents left to visit relatives one weekend. You asked me to come stay with you and told me you were ready for more.” He paused to tuck my hair behind my ear. “We hardly left your bed the entire time.”