“I thought we agreed we wouldn’t talk about him,” I murmur, closing my laptop and setting it on the coffee table in front of me.
Just the mention of his name upsets us both, for different reasons.
“I talked to him today.”
The sentence is like a bomb that’s been dropped into the center of the room and detonated on impact. I gape at her, my throat dry, my brain scrambling to come up with the right words to say in response.
“You talked to him?” I finally say breathlessly. “When? Where?” Why?
She shrugs and glances down, plucking at an invisible thread on the inside seam of her jeans. “I sent him a text and asked him to meet me at a restaurant. He agreed. I saw him earlier and let him know how I feel.”
My mouth is still hanging open and I snap my jaw shut. How did she find his number? Did she somehow . . . sneak into my phone and get it? “I don’t understand.”
“I warned him to stay away from you.”
That’s all she says. I still can hardly wrap my head around the fact that she actually went and talked to him. “And what are you going to do if he doesn’t?” I ask carefully. I’m so torn. I want to see him. Then I don’t. I hate him. I love him. But mostly, I love him. I just hate what he did, how he kept his secrets. Those secrets hurt.
They’re also the reason I was so drawn to him, why we share such a deep connection. He’s embedded in my heart, in my soul. I’m so conflicted. I don’t want him to go. I want him to stay. I’m driving myself crazy.
Clearly, I’m driving my sister crazy, too.
“Call the police. Then tear his balls off with my bare hands.” My God. She sounds so . . . furious. No wonder Ethan turned down the interview. I’m assuming Brenna scared him away from me.
“The police? He hasn’t broken the law, Brenna. You didn’t have to do that,” I start, my voice small, but she cuts me off before I can say anything else.
“Oh, but I did. You’ve told me everything, Katherine. Just because you’re not talking to him now doesn’t mean he won’t try and reach out to you eventually. You’ll start talking to him again. Or worse, you’ll meet him somewhere, he’ll ply you with lies, and the next thing we know, you’re having sex with him.” She visibly shudders. “You can’t let that happen. You can’t continue to be weak your entire life. You’ll only end up being taken advantage of, again and again.”
“You think I’m weak?” There’s an unfamiliar hard edge to my voice. “You think I let people take advantage of me?”
“I know you’re weak, Katherine. And I know people take advantage of you on a constant basis.” She touches my arm and I flinch, her hand falling away. “You want proof? I have three perfect examples. First, when you let Aaron Monroe take you out of the park. Next is when you let Lisa Swanson somehow convince you it was a good idea to do that stupid interview. And now we have Will Monroe, who somehow wormed his way into your life and into your bed.”
“Brenna!” I’m shocked by her words, at the anger behind them. “Are you implying that I asked for all of this?”
The look she sends me is accusatory. “It’s always been about you. Can’t you see it? You disappeared that day and they forgot all about me. All they could focus on was you. You were gone and I may as well have disappeared along with you, not that they would’ve noticed.”
Never in the eight years since it happened has my sister ever expressed any resentment. We became closer. I thought we still were close. She’d always been my rock when I needed her.
But now . . . I don’t know. Has she carried this resentment and anger all this time? Was it growing and festering deep inside her until she couldn’t contain it anymore?
Confusion makes my head throb and I lean forward, my elbows propped on my thighs, my head in my hands. It’s mind-boggling, how one small choice causes a ripple effect throughout the rest of your life. I had to go to the bathroom that sunny afternoon at the park. That one seemingly inconsequential decision forever changed everything.
It killed my father’s spirit and most likely sent him to an early grave.
It turned my mother into a sad, lonely woman.
It made my sister angry. Resentful. Bitter.
It made me afraid of my own shadow.
It also brought Will Monroe into your life.
I’m not so sure that’s a good thing anymore.
“I may be the older one, but I will forever remain in your shadow because of what happened to you,” she spits out as she rises to her feet. “So if you can’t tell that asshole to back off, then I will. We don’t need the Monroes doing anything else to destroy our family. I refuse to let you see him again.”
Dropping my hands, I stand and look her right in the eye, my gaze calm. Unflinching. “I won’t allow you to tell me what to do, Brenna.”
She returns my stare, equally calm. Unflinching. “And I’m not going to stand by and watch you go back to him, Katherine. If you do, that’s your choice. Just know that I won’t be a part of your life as long as you’re with him.”
My heart stalls and I exhale raggedly. “Are you actually going to make me choose?”
Brenna shrugs. “It should be easy. It’s either your family or the son of the man who raped you repeatedly when you were a child.” She pauses. “I know what my choice would be.”
If only it were that easy.