********
I fiddle with the strap of my wristlet. Alec has been quiet all night. Since we got in the car, he has seemed like he’s angry about something. I’ve asked nonchalantly if he’s all right and, each time, he’s assured me he’s fine, that everything is fine.
But I don’t believe it.
I’m standing quietly at his side as he explains his services to the CEO of a privately-funded substance abuse hospital. Listening to him, it makes perfect sense that he’s actually a psychiatrist, although these people don’t know it. They see him simply as the man that runs the company that offers the services. That’s another benefit to his unorthodox online therapy sessions—anonymity.
I have to give him credit. Alec has made two brilliant careers for himself while revealing to very few his face or his identity. No doubt the employees and social contacts that know him as one don’t know him as the other. Except for the rare case, like the doctor he saw at my father’s function, the one who knew his father.
“Alec Brand, glad you could make it.” I feel Alec’s fingers tense on my lower back at the smooth, feminine voice.
I turn to see a stunning woman standing behind us. I’d guess she’s somewhere near forty, or at least ten years older than my twenty-six and close to ten more than Alec’s thirty-one. Her long, straight hair is rich auburn and her bangs are cut severely, like Cleopatra’s. Her eyes are the palest of blue. They have a sleepy, sexy look that fits her voice to perfection. She beams an…interested smile in Alec’s direction.
“Carla,” Alec says as he bends to press his lips to her cheek. She leans in to him, stretching along his length like a cat. All that’s missing is the purr. “So good to see you.”
Carla looks behind Alec and nods at the man he was speaking with. He nods in return and then subtly turns his attention to someone else, leaving Alec to focus on her.
“I’ve missed seeing you,” she says with a wink. Alec did tell me once that, although he hadn’t “indulged” in quite a while, he did still like to visit the club and stroll through the rooms occasionally. Evidently it was enough to keep the monster at bay.
For a while anyway.
I can’t help but wonder what he’s doing now, if he’s really going without.
Alec doesn’t respond, just gives her a cool smile.
Carla looks to me and nods then returns her attention to Alec. “Is this the reason? You’ve found better entertainment at home, have you?”
“Careful, Carla. Someone might think you’re jealous,” he teases lightly.
“What if I am?” she asks. “I never thought anyone would keep you from coming to watch me.”
It’s that phrase that triggers a memory. From the night Alec took me to the club. The woman on the bed in the first room, the one who looked at us when we stopped in the doorway—that was Carla. Her smile is unmistakable.
Alec says nothing, but I feel his fingers flex against my back again and I can see the tick of the muscle in his jaw.
“It was good seeing you, Carla. Excuse us, please.”
With that, Alec applies just enough pressure to urge me to move. We walk around Carla and he guides me to the bar.
After ordering us a drink, Alec says nothing. But he doesn’t really have to. It’s obvious that he’s angry. On edge. And I’m beginning to think this might be why. I wonder if being around these people, whoever the others might be, makes his…appetite worse, makes his hunger less manageable.
When the bartender sets our drinks in front of us, Alec tips his glass back and drains it in one long gulp. I see his jaw twitch again.
“I’ll be right back,” he says tightly.
I watch him stalk away. I’m baffled by the turn this night has taken. I see Alec open a door to his left and disappear through it, leaving me at the bar with too many questions and too few answers.
Insecurity rises to the surface first. All the old feelings—feelings that I’m not enough, feelings that I’m not normal, that I’ll never be normal—battle to drag me down into a feeling of hopelessness and depression. But something stronger rises. It rises fast and high, to overwhelm and eclipse. It’s the desire to make Alec happy, to soothe his anger, to ease his frustration in any way that I can. He’s given up his pleasure to help me. At this point, I owe him.
Before I can think too much or talk myself out of it, I abandon my drink and follow Alec. I slip through the door that I saw him use. It leads to a flight of stairs. I mount them as quietly as I can and, at the top, find myself on the balcony that overlooks the ballroom.
I scan the long, narrow space for Alec. He’s standing at the half wall, looking down at the crowd below. I can see ire in every taut line of his body. For whatever reason, be it frustration or something deeper, he’s fighting for control.
I walk to where he is. Without a word, I lay my hand on his shoulder. He turns to look at me. There are sparks flying from his eyes.
“This isn’t a good time, Samantha.” His voice is a low growl.
“I know,” I say softly. I look down at the people below. None of them seem to be paying attention to us so far above, making my rash, impulsive decision an easy one.
I turn my back to the half wall and I let my wristlet fall to the floor. Alec’s eyes flit to mine and stick. He watches me intently, angrily. His teeth are gritted so hard, I can almost hear them grinding.
Slowly, I shake my hair, left long and wavy, back over my shoulders. I slide one thin strap of my dress down. It’s a nude color so I don’t think anyone below could tell what I’m doing even if they bothered to look. But I can’t be sure. And that’s part of why my stomach is in a knot of nervous excitement.
I’m turned on by the prospect of what I’m initiating. I feel the warmth already gathering between my legs, making my panties feel dewy.
I pull on my bodice just enough to free one breast. Never taking my eyes off Alec where he stands at my side, I reach over with one hand and trace his bottom lip with my finger. It relaxes enough that I can slip inside. I drag the tip along the straight edge of his teeth until I feel the brush of his tongue, hot and slick.
I remove my wet finger and trace a damp circle around my nipple. It puckers in response. When Alec’s eyes leave mine and drop to my hand, I give my nipple a little pinch, feeling the sensation all the way down to my core. I know he likes that.