“What is it?” Jared said, grazing his lips across a smal patch of skin on my forehead.
“It doesn’t matter,” I said closing my eyes. I wanted to focus on the sounds of the waves rushing the beach, and the way the breeze blew my hair forward. If it were possible to block the frightening thoughts from my head, I would have. I wanted to pretend that the truths I had come across in recent years weren’t real. But they were, and inconceivable, nightmarish things waited for us at home. Those thoughts made it difficult to relax and enjoy my honeymoon, even with Jared’s tireless reassurance. I had final y accepted my life for what it was, but that didn’t make it less frightening.
“Look,” Jared said, nodding to a spot up the beach.
Samuel stood at least two hundred yards away, too far away for my human eyes to tel if he was watching us or the ocean.
Jared nuzzled the hair just above my ear. “He has been granted a temporary new post.”
“To babysit us?” I asked. “He must be thril ed.”
Jared chuckled. “Something like that. Hybrids don’t have Archs. Have I ever told you that?”
“No, you didn’t.”
“We don’t. Our job to protect humans, that along with our knowledge and abilities makes having our own guardian angel redundant. Not to mention the curse….”
“But you stil need protection, don’t you?” I asked.
Jared thought for a moment. “We are born to protect. I think He sees it as an infinite waste of resources.”
I nodded. “I see.”
Jared’s brows pul ed in and he cocked his head a bit. “You seem different today.”
“I do? What’s wrong with me?”
Jared laughed. “Not your general wel -being, I mean you. Your behavior. You seem less on edge. Why is that?”
My brows shot up, and I shrugged. “It’s not because I’m not worried, I can promise you that. I have one more year of col ege, I’ll be taking over Titan soon after…and I’m pregnant. The best part—my personal favorite—I have to be on guard for the next nine months just to stay alive long enough to deliver our baby, and hope the Creator of the Universe decides against his own rules to help us do that.”
“Ten.”
“What?”
“It’s actual y ten months. Forty weeks is ten months.”
I frowned. “That doesn’t help.”
Jared stifled a grin. “I was proud of you at the hearing.” When I didn’t reply, Jared explained further, “With Michael. You made a great case. It might have been what kept me out of serious trouble.”
“What might have happened? If Eli had decided against you?”
“The worst punishment would be death.”
“But…,” I began, thinking as I spoke, “you can’t die unless I do.”
“Or if I’m found guilty of disturbing The Balance. Heaven has zero tolerance for both of those things.”
“The baby supposedly disturbs The Balance,” I said, touching my bel y.
Jared put his hand on mine. “God didn’t create the baby, Nina, we did. Free wil and The Law are on opposite ends of the universe. I could explain it for the rest of your life, and you stil wouldn’t understand. Even I don’t ful y understand it all . Just know that The Law is a constant, and The Balance is a variable. In our case, it depended on Free Wil , and that makes The Balance a whole new beast.”
“My head hurts,” I said.
“I’m sorry. More water?”
I looked down to my glass. It was empty. “I hadn’t even realized I’d touched it.”
Jared moved his hand up my arm, his fingers pressuring different spots. “Your temperature is elevated, but I believe it’s due to the pregnancy.”
I nodded, staring out into the ocean. “Wil it ever be over, Jared? Once the baby is born, wil we have to keep fighting for every day?”
“No. Heaven wil have to decide at some point that enough is enough. They wil either save us or let us die. Once that decision is made, we are protected.”
I looked up to the sky. “Why doesn’t He just make it now?” Jared didn’t answer, and it was just as wel . I didn’t expect him to. “Jared…,” I hesitated. I didn’t want to ruin our perfect morning. “I think I should continue my training.”
He sighed. “You’re pregnant, Nina.”
“Yes, I know. But, can we both agree that there may come a time when I might have to defend myself...or the baby? I’m not asking you to beat the crap out of me; I’d just like to spend more time with the firearms, and for you to teach me some more complex moves.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
Jared wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my head. “You’re right. We have to be prepared for anything. We’ll start when we get back.”
I smiled. “Thank you.”
He leaned back, and lowered his chin so that I would meet his gaze. “You have to take it easy, though. I mean it.”
“I wil . I promise.”
Satisfied, Jared took my glass and returned moments later with a fresh batch of ice floating in the water. I took a sip and sighed, trying my best to relax.
We sat in the morning sun, waiting as it crawled across the sky, hiding every so often behind the errant cloud. Jared and I were wrapped in each other’s arms, enjoying a smal moment of peace. Eventual y, my stomach began to protest.