It made me ache to get even closer to Zane, but the only way to make that happen at this point is for me to see him in person. And we both know that’s not happening.
“Listen, Cady-girl,” Cillian says as he stands up from his chair. “I know this sucks for you, but you either need to accept that Zane is just a friend, or you need to cut him loose completely. You’ll never get out and find your soul mate as long as you’re still yearning for him.”
“Or just accept he’s your soul mate and do something about it,” Renner chimes in.
I open my mouth to say, He’s not my soul mate, but then snap it shut just as quickly. I don’t know what Zane is to me, but I know he’s so much more than just a friend. I just haven’t figured out how to reconcile that.
Cillian and Renner stay for another beer, and we thankfully move on to another topic. I sit back on the couch and watch as Renner and Cillian argue about whether Renner should get a job or stay free to be able to tour with Cillian’s band. It’s an argument I’ve been privy to before, but I’ve always wisely kept my opinion to myself. I know, as a modern woman, Renner wants to work and contribute financially, but I also know she’d be miserable without Cillian. She should just do herself a favor and commit to going out on tour with him.
After they’re gone, I complete my nightly ritual. I wash my face, apply moisturizer, and brush my teeth. Making myself a cup of hot tea, I place it on my nightstand beside my bed, where I’ll sip at it while reading Zane’s latest email.
No matter where he is or what he’s doing, he always has an email or a text waiting for me before I go to bed. I’m not sure how he quite swings it with his busy schedule, particularly since he has started his regular hockey season, but it’s almost always there.
Yes, our emails, texts, or calls have turned into almost daily conversations. Sometimes, one of us will miss a day, or it may only be a short message, but it’s something I look forward to more than I care to admit.
To: Cady Dunne
From: Zane Kavanaugh
Subject: You Are Just Too Much
Date: October 29, 2014
I’m getting ready to head out to the airport to catch the team plane soon, but had to get off this email so it would be waiting for you when you went to sleep. I got your package in the mail today and as my subject line says, “You are just too much.” I seriously cannot believe you sent me that hat. Where in the fuck did you find it, first of all, and second… why would you buy something so hideous? I am now on the hunt to outdo you, so be expecting something in the mail soon.
Gotta go. I assume you’re going to watch tomorrow’s game since it will broadcast early evening there, right? I’m not sure why, but I think I play better when I know you’re watching me.
Yours,
Zane
I take a moment, bringing my fingers to my lips to feel the curve of the silly smile on my face. I think about the hat that I sent Zane, and then I start to snicker to myself.
Week before last, Zane scored a hat trick against the Rangers. I’ve come to learn a lot about hockey since meeting him, and I’ve been fortunate that Setanta Sports broadcasts live NHL games, and even more fortunate that Da carries that package at his pub, The Hibernian. I’ve watched as many of Zane’s games that I can, sending him texts with my thoughts as I cheer him on from Ireland.
When he scored a hat trick, I had no clue what that was, but a quick Google search on my phone yielded the answer. That night, I found the perfect gift to congratulate him, and had it shipped directly to his house. It was a black velvet top hat… the kind you see magicians wearing. Perched on top was a deranged-looking, white, stuffed rabbit whose eyes looked slightly maniacal and whose buckteeth hung halfway down its chest. When you pushed on his belly, he squeaked out, “Abracadabra,” and then giggled hysterically.
He clearly enjoyed my gag gift, but that’s not what’s making me smile.
I’m smiling in a wholly satisfied way because of the way he signed off on the email.
Yours,
Zane
Yours.
I liked that a lot.
Chapter 8
Zane
November
“Dude… what the fuck is your problem? I think you need to see the team doctor,” Niko says as he takes a sip of his beer. He has a gorgeous brunette perched on his lap, and his hand is inching its way up her leg. She doesn’t seem to mind but rather spreads her legs apart a bit.
“The team doctor?” I ask blandly, and then drain the last of my beer. Raising my hand toward our waitress who is walking by, I try to catch her attention that I want another but, sadly, she ignores me.
“Yeah… I think your pecker is broken or something. You don’t seem to be interested in the ladies anymore.”
Snorting internally, I reach into my wallet to pull out some cash for when she comes back by. I don’t bother answering Niko because I know he’s just busting my chops.
He dislodges the girl from his lap, and she walks off toward the bar. Leaning in toward me, he whispers. “Wait a minute? Are you gay or something? Is that why you haven’t been fucking around with women anymore?”
I quirk an eyebrow at Niko and give him a smirk. “Not gay, dude.”
“Then seriously… what’s the deal? You hardly ever go out anymore, and when you do, you spend most of your time on that phone of yours.”
He’s talking about my obsessive checking of my emails and texts, waiting for Cady to respond to my latest and greatest. Our chatter back and forth is almost constant now, and while we don’t talk on the phone as much as we email and text, it’s still amazing conversation all of the time.