Home > Maybe This Time (Maybe #1)(8)

Maybe This Time (Maybe #1)(8)
Author: Chantal Fernando

“Yeah, all good things, of course.”

I roll my eyes at him.

A knock on the door disturbs our banter, and Xander goes to answer it. As soon as he says the words ‘hey, mum’ I freeze. I don’t want to meet his mother. I quickly stand and head towards my room. I’m halfway there, almost safe, when Xander calls out my name.

“Summer, come meet my mum,” he says. I close my eyes for a second, before turning around. I try to smile but I think it comes out more like a grimace.

“Mum, this is Summer. Summer, this is my mum, Daria,” he introduces. She is pretty, with mousy brown hair and clear blue eyes. She’s a little on the thin side, and looks to be in her late forties or early fifties.

“Nice to meet you,” I say, hoping they'll start to talk so I can sneak away. All I can think is, this is the woman my dad cheated with when he was married to my mother. I don’t know how to feel. Daria’s eyes seem kind as she watches me, before she finally speaks.

"Nice to meet you too, Summer, I’ve heard so much about you over the years.”

“Really?” I manage to say, feeling surprised. I wouldn’t have thought they would have discussed me at all. My eyes dart to my brother. He must see the look on my face because he frowns, and then starts to take Daria into the kitchen, offering her some coffee.

He glances back at me, so I attempt another smile before walking back into my room and quietly closing the door. She might have heard about me, but I’ve heard nothing about her except that she’s a home wrecker.

Xander walks into my room an hour later without knocking. “What was that?” he asks, sounding confused, and a little angry.

“What was what?” I ask, closing my laptop.

“You looked at my mum like she was the devil,” he says dryly.

“I don’t know, I just don’t know her,” I lie.

“Summer, she’s a nice person. She'll take care of you if you let her,” he says, his voice gentling.

I can just imagine my mother turning in her grave right now.

“I don’t need a replacement mother,” I snap, losing my patience with the topic.

“Fuck, I know. I didn’t mean that. You just looked upset, and…” he trails off, a look of realisation taking over his expression. “You’re holding a grudge over something that happened what, nineteen years ago?”

“If dad didn’t cheat with her, maybe I would have actually had a father growing up,” I tell him, deciding to be honest. I know my feelings aren’t fair. But that doesn't change the fact that I have them.

“So, you'd rather I wasn’t born at all,” he snaps back at me, making me wince. I didn’t even think of that. In fact, I was just thinking of myself, no one else.

“Of course not, Xander,” I say, rubbing my palm on my forehead.

He doesn’t say anything, so I try again.

“I’ll try next time, okay. I can’t help how I feel, Xander, but I’ll try,” I promise him.

“Okay,” he says, seemingly satisfied. We hear a knock on the door and Xander leaves to answer it.

I prop the pillows up, and lay back on them so I’m in a sitting position. Opening my laptop, I start to check my emails when Reid walks in. The door was left open, so he clearly didn’t feel the need to knock. He’s wearing basketball shorts, a tight white V neck T-shirt and sneakers.

“Hey,” he says, a little warily.

“Hey.”

“You okay?” he asks, looking concerned.

“I’m fine, why?” I ask. “You can sit down,” I offer, pointing to the end of my bed. He hesitantly sits down, then looks back at me.

“Xander said you were upset about something,” he says kindly. He sounds genuine, like he really cares about what I have to say.

“I’ll be okay, I’m just trying to be a better person and not let my mother control or define my actions anymore,” I say honestly. As it leaves my mouth, I can’t believe I told him that. It's one of the most honest things I’ve ever said.

He nods, like he understands. “The fact that you’re acknowledging it is a step in the right direction.”

“I guess so. It’s just messing with my mind right now,” I admit.

“Trust me, I know the feeling,” he says, scowling a little.

“I just don’t want to hurt Xander. It’s hard, though, when you grow up being told one thing, and then you find out it’s not the truth at all.”

“You’re a good girl, Summer, forget about what you’ve been told. Start fresh and figure it out for yourself. Things aren’t always what they seem,” he says, looking down at the floor.

“You’re being nice again, why?” I ask, closing my laptop.

He smirks. “Calling me out, are you?”

“Yeah, well, the hot and cold act is really getting old,” I say, pursing my lips.

He nods twice. “Yeah, it would, wouldn’t it? Look, I have a lot of shit going on in my life right now. I’m not in a good place. That doesn’t mean I don’t… care about you.”

Then he stands up and walks away.

*****

“Get dressed, I’m taking you out.” Xander says the next day when he walks into my room. "Dress in workout clothes," he adds before he closes the door.

‘Out’ ends up being me going with him to his gym. The gym is a warehouse, but it looks pretty decent. It has an octagon shaped cage, a boxing ring, and then a section with weights, a treadmill and other gym equipment.

   
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