I gathered up the overnight bag of random stuff I’d accumulated when at my mom’s. I’d left with nothing but the clothes on my back, and of course she’d taken me shopping, for some new clothes, shoes and makeup. Cohen watched my every move as I wrestled the large bag from the passenger seat.
Bob sat at Cohen’s heels, but when I got near he charged forward, yanking the leash free from Cohen’s grasp and charging straight for me.
I steered clear of Bob’s path, grabbing his leash and returning it to Cohen’s outstretched hand. “How’s your shoulder?” I nodded toward his arm, held immobile by the sling.
“Fine, as long as I don’t move it. It should heal up nicely. But I can’t respond to calls for the next eight weeks.”
I nodded. “I’m glad to see you up and around.”
He squinted, looking unsure.
“It’s just the last time I saw you, you were still unconscious after surgery,” I explained.
“You came to the hospital?” He eyed me warily.
“Of course. A couple of times. And I stayed with Grace so your mom could come that first night, and I took care of Bob too.”
The look on his face told me he was either mentally solving a long equation, or this information was entirely new to him.
Of course his mother didn’t tell him. I took a step closer to him. “I was there, Cohen. I wanted to see you, and your mom thought it was best… I mean, it probably was for the best that I just let you be.”
“Why would you say that? My mother doesn’t know shit about what I want or need. I would have wanted to see you. That night with you was the best night of my life, and then after…when you took off…” He stopped abruptly, and looked down, his eyes burning with intensity.
“I’m sorry,” I managed in barely a whisper. I knew it wasn’t the apology he deserved, but words seemed to be escaping me. I looked down at the sidewalk, all of my courage dissolving at the sight of him.
“You were scared,” he said.
I looked up and met his gaze. He was the same confident, beautiful man I’d fallen for, if not a bit more banged up and wary of me. It broke my heart to see him like this, knowing I was the cause of it.
He rubbed a hand across his stubble-roughened jaw then adjusted the strap on his sling. “Come inside. We’re not talking about this out on the street.”
I swallowed and nodded my consent.
We didn’t even bother stopping at my place to drop off my bag, but instead I followed him and Bob up the stairs. I was sure my cats would be okay without me for a little while longer, Ashlyn always took good care of them when I was away. As we made our way up the stairs, I couldn’t help but notice even Bob was acting different, like he could sense the tension between us, and his normally happy-go-lucky mood was replaced by one of calm.
When we reached his apartment Cohen freed Bob from the leash and then shrugged out of his sling, rolling his neck to shake off the aches and pains.
“Aren’t you supposed to keep that on?” I looked at the discarded sling.
He nodded. “Probably. It’s uncomfortable though.”
Men could be such babies. I picked up the sling from the couch and folded it before setting it aside on the trunk in front of the sofa.
“Sit down. Do you want something? Water? Sorry, I don’t have much else. Haven’t been to the store in a while.”
The way he said it made me wonder if he’d been eating, and I imagined it’d be difficult to prepare meals one-handed.
“No, I’m fine.” I sat down on the opposite side of the sofa, keeping some distance between us.
Cohen tucked his arm against his side, so as not to jostle it, and sat down. “So, I, um, talked to Ashlyn. I didn’t know where you were staying, and she told me…some things about your past.”
A lump rose in my throat and I clenched my hands into fists. Damn it, Ashlyn.
“She didn’t tell me much, said it was your story to tell, but just that I didn’t know what you’d been though and not to judge you too harshly.”
I released the breath I’d been holding. “Is that all she told you?”
He shook his head. “She also said you’re not as tough as you try to seem.”
I smiled wryly. Well, after the way I’d broken down this past week, I supposed that much was true.
He shifted closer to me on the sofa, closing some of the distance between us. “So…” he prompted.
I chewed on my lip, deciding if I could tell him. This wasn’t how I pictured it. I’d imagined I’d have time to prepare what I wanted to say, be dressed in something cute—hell, at least be showered—and maybe tell him over drinks to soften the blow. But I summoned my courage. It was either explain myself now, or lose Cohen forever. I cleared my throat and began. “You deserve to know, I know that. And I want you to know that what you gave me, what we shared, it meant a lot to me too.”
He smiled and took my hand. “Just say it. What could possibly be so bad, Easy E?”
I shifted away from him, uncomfortably. I couldn’t allow myself to get my hopes up for him to just reject me in the end. It was the entire reason I’d tried to keep him at arm’s length, and then pushed him away. I wrung my hands in my lap. “I was engaged.” My eyes flicked to his, and they were concerned and curious, but not angry. Yet.
I took a fortifying breath, and told him the rest of the story, not once stopping or breezing by a single detail. Cohen stayed silent, holding my hand, waiting for me to get all the words out. He rubbed slow circles on the back of my hand with his thumb, not interrupting or asking any questions, just listening attentively. I was in tears by the time it was over.