I’ve always craved a boy to look at me like that. Now one is, but all I can think about is the scowling face across the room.
“Cassie, I want to kiss you.”
He seems to search my face, looking for an answer. I want to be kissed, but I think it’s the alcohol.
Ruby’s voice is in my head telling me to stop being a pussy and just do it.
Connor’s gazing at my mouth as his face gets closer and closer, and I’m too hot and too drunk.
Then Connor’s kissing me, and there’s part of me that wants to kiss him back, but I can’t.
I pull away. “Connor…”
He smiles and drops his head.
“I’m sorry,” I say. I think I must be defective for not kissing him, because he’s really handsome and sweet.
He shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it.”
“I want to, I do…” I say, slurring but sincere.
“Yeah, but I get the feeling you want to kiss someone else more.”
He touches my cheek, and I don’t have a chance to tell him he’s wrong before he’s disappearing up the stairs.
The music changes, and it makes the floor shift so much I have to sit down.
I stagger toward the couches. They seem so far away.
Someone grabs my arm and guides me. Without looking, I know it’s Holt.
Jack appears on the other side and laughs. “Taylor, you are sooooo fucked up!”
Hyena giggles all around.
Warm hands are trying to push me onto the couch, but Jack gives me the bottle again, and it would be rude not to drink. I slap at the helpy hands and take the bottle.
I sip it and pull a face. It’s gross but awesome.
Everyone laughs, and so do I. Too loud. Too shrill. Drunk me laughs like an idiot.
“Okay, that’s it, she’s had enough.”
Holt’s voice. Gruff. Sounds like my father.
“Dude, no one’s forcing it down her throat. She’s a big girl.”
“Pass the bottle to someone else, Avery. Now.”
I stumble and everyone giggles.
Obviously, drunk-Cassie is hilarious.
They’re all blurry now. I’m blinking way too long. I sway and warm hands are on me again.
“Christ, Taylor, would you sit before you fall down?”
Cranky voice. Doesn’t approve of Drunk Cassie.
Drunk Cassie doesn’t give a flying fuck.
Giggles.
Just said the “F” word. In my brain.
Naughty Drunk Cassie.
I flop down on the sofa. It’s soft, and I’m tired. Seriously tired.
I lean against his body. Hard and warm. Smells good. I turn my face so I can smell better. Cotton shirt. Shoulder. Grab and sniff. Nice.
“Fuck me.” Man-voice. Sexy.
I grab more of him. Tug at his collar so I can get closer. Under the collar is skin. Warm. Tingly under my fingers.
“Jesus, Taylor…” His voice isn’t angry anymore. Different. Begging. “Stop.”
“No. S’nice. Smellsgood.”
Want more warm so I climb onto his lap. Legs either side of hips. Nose in neck. Hands in hair. So good.
“For fuck’s sake.” He pushes me away, and I pout.
I look at his face. So handsome when he frowns.
“Taylor, stop. You’re drunk.”
I flop forward.
“Please,” I say, fitting myself against his body. “Juswanna sleep for a minute.”
Nuzzle into neck again. Breathe in warm boy-skin.
He’s tense underneath me, but I’m comfortable. He smells amazing.
“Hey, check it out!” Shhh, Jack. Too loud. “Taylor’s finally found a way to rattle the unflappable Holt. I think he’s blushing!”
More laughter.
I whisper, “Shh,” and my lips touch his neck. He groans, and I want to do it again.
“Avery, you asshole.” He’s talking softly, but it’s still too loud. I try to cover his mouth with my hand, but he pulls it away. “She drank too much and she’s going to be sick.”
“She’s fine, man. Look at that smile. She can’t get enough of you. I wouldn’t be complaining if I was in your shoes.”
I want everyone to stop talking. Just wanna sleep.
I moan and bury my head further into Holt’s neck. He squirms underneath me.
“Get her some water before I kick your fucking ass.” His chest vibrates against my boobs when he talks. Feels nice. Manly.
“Okay, okay. Christ, take a fucking pill.”
I snuggle down. “Stoptalkin. Shh. Need to sleep.”
“Taylor.” His voice is softer, less cranky. “You need to get off me. Please.”
“Donwanna. Feels good.” I put my hand inside his shirt. Nice muscles. So nice.
“Fuck, Taylor. For the love of God, stop, before I do something really fucking stupid.”
His hands are on my hips, trying to move me. I move but not off him. I press down.
I feel him against me. Hard. God. So hard.
He groans again, his face in my neck. “Jesus…”
My whole body burns. Aches. Wants.
I move against him.
He swears, and it’s all sexy. His lips are near my ear.
“Cassie, not like this.” He grabs my hips and stills me. “Not when you’re drunk and won’t remember it tomorrow. Stop.”
I’m burning, but he won’t let me move.
I slump. Defeated.
“Cassie, look at me.”