After the disaster at dinner, I need her here. I need her more than her desire to keep me at arm’s length and definitely more than my pride. She gets me. It’s not often you find someone that you don’t need to constantly explain yourself to. It’s never happened to me before and I’m not about to miss this opportunity. And maybe I am asking too much of a girl who has been very clear about friend-zoning me from the start, but I’m going to take anything I can get…even if it comes with the nastiest case of blue balls I’ve ever experienced.
I grab a t-shirt out of the dresser and toss it at her. Catching it, she holds it up to her body and the hem of my shirt hits her knees. Alice isn’t tiny, around 5’6”, but I’ve got a good six inches on her. She giggles, and my heart feels it. I swear the sound of her laughter has the power to push into place whatever it is that feels out of sorts inside my chest. She catches me staring at her mouth and her forehead wrinkles. I clear my throat, look away.
“There are clean towels under the sink and new toothbrushes. Take whatever you need.”
“Where’s Dallas and the Petermans?”
“Dall got in his car and said he’d be back in a few days. And the twins are with their parents until tomorrow.” A really awkward moment of silence ensues where I can’t help staring at her and she can’t seem to meet my eyes. “Al?” She quickly glances up. “If you’re uncomfortable…”
“No, I’m good.” She smiles and holds up the t-shirt as she crosses the bedroom headed for the bathroom. “Let me get changed.”
“Wanna watch something? I have Netflix and Apple TV.”
“Of course you do,” she teases. “Pick something and I’ll be out in a minute.”
The door shuts and I strip down to my black boxer briefs and select something to watch. Dead Pool 2. Perfect. After what happened at dinner, I’m wrecked and in dire need of a mindless distraction. I grab a couple of bottles of water out of the small refrigerator in my room, set them by the nightstand. I want her to be comfortable. That’s all…or maybe I’m somewhat nervous too.
Alice steps out of the bathroom wearing my favorite t-shirt. It hangs loosely to her knees, except for where the tips of her hard nipples tent the fabric. And the minute I get a good look, I lose what’s left of my mind and go full-on cro-fucking-magnon.
This was a mistake. Having her here is a mistake. My dick decides this is a great time to introduce himself, and the best I can do is drop my hands in front and pray she doesn’t notice.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” I duck out, turn away from her, and walk into the bathroom without meeting her searching gaze. Minutes later, I step out and find Alice tucked in bed. Without any makeup, she looks so much younger than…
“Are you twenty-one yet?”
“February thirteen.” She beams up at me, her full pink lips parting to show her bright white teeth. And damn if she isn’t the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
“Don’t make plans. I’m taking you out.”
Her thumb runs back and forth across her bottom lip as she studies me. “The girls may want to do something, bossy pants.”
Bossy pants? Whatever. “We’ll take them with us.” She can call me whatever she wants as long as she keeps smiling at me like that.
“You’d do that?” The pitch of her voice rises, her excitement palpable. I want her to look at me that way forever––like I can do no wrong.
“It’s your birthday, Bailey.” I shrug. “I’ll do whatever makes you happy.”
I find myself staring at her mouth again. Swear to God, I’m under a spell. One more kiss. Just one. Then I’ll slide between those shapely white thighs, push myself inside of her, and fuck her into next week the way I’ve been dreaming about doing for the past two months.
“What are we watching?” She looks so oblivious to the filthy shit that’s playing out in my mind that it almost makes me laugh.
When I don’t answer right away, she stares at me blankly, puzzled by my behavior. Can’t blame her. I’m standing by the side of the bed, looking at her like a twelve-year-old that’s gotten his first peek at Internet porn, so a little confusion is justified.
I slide into bed making sure to stay on my side. It’s a California king-size bed. This should keep some respectable distance between us. Otherwise it’ll be another sleepless night for me.
“Dead Pool 2.”
“Oh good. I love Dead Pool. Do you mind? My feet are cold.”
No sooner has she made this announcement than her feet are on mine. Cold doesn’t even begin to describe them. I yelp, jerking them back. “The hell! Are you…what the…I’ve dissected dead things with more body heat.”
Laughter breaks out. Head thrown back, uncontrollable laughter. It’s husky and sexy as hell. A familiar sensation stirs in my balls. This was a mistake.
“Gimme those frozen toes.”
Still smiling, she narrows her eyes. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m not having those dead things sneak up on me in the middle of the night. Hand them over.”
Chewing on her lip, she considers my command. “You’re very bossy tonight.”
There’s a teasing note in her voice that feeds my lust. I wonder what it would sound like whispered in my ear as I’m driving my dick inside of her. The image has my heart thrashing inside my chest.
“What are you thinking about? You have a weird look on your face.”
I can’t answer. I’m too busy watching her pull her legs out from beneath the covers and extending them in my direction. I love her legs. Not a single blemish or freckle. Pale and curved in all the right places. I’d love them even more wrapped around my waist.
She places her feet in my lap, and I shift my hips to hide my hard-on. Her delicate toes are painted light purple and so damn cute. I picture them rubbing up and down my shaft.
“Nothing. I’m thinking about your dead toes.”
She laughs again. I take her feet between my hands, push my thumbs into the arches. Her eyelids get heavy and her mouth slack. I give her toes a gentle tug and a soft whimper slips out.
“Oh God, that feels so good…” She gasps when I cup them and gently squeeze. “Don’t stop.”
And as I watch her face glow with pleasure, I say what’s been on my mind since we got back. “I’m sorry my parents were rude to you. I shouldn’t have forced you to come.”
There’s only understanding on her face. No pity, no judgment. I can tell her anything and not feel threatened. That’s never happened to me before and the feeling is addicting as hell. I am fucking crazy about this girl and every minute I’m with her I fall deeper and deeper.
I play with her toes, slide my index finger along the sensitive skin between each of them. She shivers and inhales sharply. I look up, into her heavy-lidded eyes, and time stands still. I see my life, next year in med school. No sleep. I’m miserable, just going through the motions. Then I see Alice living her life. Laughing with her friends…talking to the douchebag in her film class. And my heart sinks into my gut.
“Stop apologizing,” she murmurs, snapping me out of the moment. “I wanted to go with you. You don’t need to be responsible for me the way you are for everything and everyone else…I will say this, they’re actually worse than you described them. Now I know why Brian is so troubled.” She presses her toes into my abs and I swallow down a groan. “I have no idea how you turned out so well.”
“They definitely did their best to screw us up, but my brother started using because of a girl.”
Her flashing eyes, burning with curiosity, scan my face. She sits up abruptly, takes her feet back, and crosses her legs. I instantly miss them. “How?”
Exhaling tiredly, I decide on the abridged version. “Brian was always the perfect son. Amazing swimmer, nationally ranked. Great water polo player. Academic highest honors––you know, all that. Sophomore year a girl named Jessie Turner transferred in from Santa Cruz. Gorgeous, best-looking girl in school and that’s saying a lot. She ran with a really fast crowd––already doing eight balls as a sophomore.”
Alice’s eyes get even bigger.
“Yeah. Played the broken damsel part like a fucking Oscar winner. Brian fell hard for her. He started doing coke to party. She was always taunting him into shit. Saying he didn’t have the balls for it…anyway, it worked. He started experimenting. Started cutting school. Got kicked off the water polo team for not showing up for a game. Then he won a swim meet and tested positive. My parents sent him straight to rehab…while Brian was in rehab, Jessie overdosed and died.”
A gasp has me looking up into Alice’s soft brown eyes. I won’t lie. In the past, I’ve used women as a refuge from all the responsibility weighing on me as much as they used me for their own self-interest. It was a perfect arrangement. The problem is the high-flying vibes only lasted until the following morning. Then I’d wake up alone and find myself scraping bottom again. But Alice? It’s not her body that gives a man a soft place to land––it’s her eyes.
“He went off the rails. Broke out of rehab and went on a three-month bender that had my parents picking him up in a drug den in San Francisco. After that it was just more of the same. He never even got his high school diploma…”
She takes my hands in hers, tugs on my fingers the same way I tugged on her toes, her gaze cast down on where we touch.
“I was thirteen and the first lesson I learned about love was that it could ruin your entire life.”
“Do you still believe that?” She looks up then, and it takes everything I’ve got not to kiss her.
“No.”
Not since I met you, the words form in my head. And that’s where they stay.
Alice
A chill wakes me abruptly out of a deep sleep. Confused, I scan the room until I’m reminded that I’m at Reagan’s. In his bedroom. Alone in his bed. Then it all comes back to me. The horrible dinner. The heart-to-heart. After the talk we were both exhausted. He put on Dead Pool 2, and we fell into a comfortable silence. The kind you rarely find and often yearn for. I only made it through the opening credits.