I ignore him and straddle my bike.
I need to go get my woman.
*****
Rex’s bike is nowhere in sight when I pull up in Trill’s driveway. Maybe the man is smarter than he looks. Pulling out my key, I unlock the door and storm inside. I find her sitting in front of the TV. She doesn’t look at me even though she has to have heard me enter.
“Will you listen to what I have to say?” I ask gently.
“Do you know what it feels like to find out something from other people that you should have heard from your boyfriend in the first place?” she fires back.
“That isn’t really something I wanted to share with anyone.”
Especially with her.
“Zach is one of my best friends, even though he was a dick tonight, and you and he have slept with the same women before? At the same time? Do you know how awkward that is?”
I sit down next to her but don’t touch her yet. “Baby, it’s not a recent thing. We were young, horny, and stupid. I hadn’t even met you then. How can you hold it against me?”
She stares down at her hands. “When was the last time?”
I rack my brain. “I think we were twenty. So a few years now.”
“I just feel like… What if you want to do something like that again? What if I can’t keep your interest? You have all this sexual experience and I have hardly any. I don’t want you to get bored,” she admits in a small voice.
I lift her face so she has to look at me. “It didn’t mean anything. I love you. I wouldn’t change you for anything. Do you understand me? If I wanted that, I could have it, but I don’t. We were young and experimenting. I know I should have told you, but to be honest, I didn’t want to scare you off, and it’s not something I just go around sharing. We haven’t spoken in detail about my sexual past and I thought that maybe you didn’t want to know.”
She cringes. “I don’t want to know details or anything. But if we run into someone you’ve been with, I’d like to know that.”
I tilt my head to the side. “Okay, that I can do. You can ask me anything you want, Trillian. I’ve never lied to you.”
“I know you’ve been around,” she adds, sniffling, “so it’s hard to believe sometimes that you’re willing to settle down with me and be with only me.”
I lower my head to taste her sweet lips. “I want you. Only you. I’m fuckin’ obsessed with you, Trillian. We just are, you know? You’re the one for me. Stop questioning it, baby. I love you.”
“I love you, too,” she whispers, her body relaxing. She leans her head on my shoulder, and I exhale slowly in relief.
“I just can’t get the image out of my head,” she whispers. “I know it’s stupid.”
“What you feel isn’t stupid, Trill. It never is, not to me. I know I’d hate it if our places were reversed. The only thing I can say is that nothing that happened before matters anymore. This right here is what I want, and you are who I was meant to be with.”
She flashes me a small smile. “So you don’t want to share me with anyone else?”
“Even the thought of it makes me want to kill someone. If there’s something you wanted to do or try, I will do it for you, but I’d never want to share you. Ever. I don’t think I’d handle it very well.”
“Understatement,” she mumbles.
I kiss her temple. “You’re mine and mine only. I’m greedy when it comes to you.”
“Well, I’m glad,” she replies in a dry tone, “because if Zach put his penis near me, I’d probably scream.”
She’s only joking, but the thought of Zach or anyone near her, makes me extremely angry.
“It’s just you and me, Trill,” I say, trying to calm myself. “We don’t need anyone else or anything else to get us by.”
“Just… I don’t want to hear anything else from someone else. I’d like it to come from you, okay? When someone else tells me things, it makes me feel like I don’t know you.”
I’ve really fucked up.
“Okay, I promise,” I tell her, meaning every word. “I’d never do anything to mess this up. I might be a dick sometimes, but I’d never cheat on you, or look elsewhere. Why would I? I’m not stupid or blind. I know the value of what I have in my arms.”
“Xander—”
“Next time you get pissed, you don’t fuckin’ run away, Trill. Getting on Rex’s bike? I didn’t like that.”
In fact, I hated it. I didn’t trust that fucker, and I didn’t like her being on his bike, especially because I know he wants her. I also wanted to make sure she was safe.
“I know,” she says. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to leave.”
I nod. “We’re still learning about each other every day. We’ll get there. We’re going to make mistakes, but at the end of the day, we’ll come together, just like this. But you need to talk to me. Don’t run from me. I want you too fuckin’ badly to ever let you go.”
She giggles. “You’re so smooth.”
Liking the sound of her happy giggles, I push her back on the couch. “Smooth? Hmmmm. With you, it’s just me being honest.”
“And with the other women?” she asks, wrinkling her cute nose.
My mouth twitches. “Yeah, okay. I can be pretty smooth.”