“Why’s that?”
I take a second to gather my thoughts because I immediately want to tell him the truth. I’m not sure why since the only person I have spoken to about my sister is Candace. She had already told me how demeaning her parents are and how hard it was for her growing up in a house with them, so when I finally opened up to her, I knew she would be able to relate to me. I decide to go with my gut and reveal, “I have a sister, but . . . she died five years ago. And, in a way, my parents did too. I’m pretty much invisible.”
“Shit. I’m sorry, man.”
Hearing the regretful tone in his voice makes me feel bad for making him uncomfortable, so I brush it off quickly. “Don’t be. It’s life.”
“So I take it you’ll most likely stay here after you graduate?”
Finally making it to the top of the hill, we turn the corner, and I sigh when I see we have hit a flat street. Mark laughs, and I turn to look at him and say, “That bitch of a hill nearly kicked my ass.”
I laugh with him for a moment before answering his question. “I doubt I’ll ever go back home. So, yeah, I plan on staying.”
A smile crosses his face, and we both power run back to the gym. Once we hit the parking lot, I am thoroughly drained. I open the back door to my car and grab a couple bottles of water from my gym bag. Tossing one to Mark, I down mine quickly.
“Thanks for the workout,” he says as he moves to lean against my car next to me.
“Yeah. Anytime.”
“So, hey, I’m gonna be up on campus later this week. I have to shift one of my studios around, and the online enrollment isn’t letting me make the change. You wanna meet up for coffee or something afterwards?”
“Sounds good. Just give me a call,” I say as Mark steps in front of me and leans in, giving me a slow kiss that lingers long on my lips.
I wrap my arm around his waist, fisting his damp shirt, and pull him closer to me. I’m not exactly sure what we’re doing, but I want it. I’ve never been this way before with anyone else, drawn to them like I am with Mark. Getting to know each other—I like it—and I like him, but at the same time, I’m wondering what this all means.
Mark slides his tongue across my lower lip before dipping it into my mouth. Licking and exploring, I have to break the kiss before he can tell just how turned on he’s making me. Something about Mark tells me he isn’t into just screwing around, so I tell him, “You can’t keep doing this to me in parking lots.”
Chuckling, he smiles and responds with, “I agree. I’ll call you later?”
“Yeah.”
“You want a glass of wine?” I ask from the kitchen.
“Please.”
I pop the cork and pour Candace a glass of Merlot before getting myself a beer and joining her on my couch. She’s laughing her ass off, watching an episode of ‘Ridiculousness’ on MTV. We often get together in the evenings and watch these shows. I love that she has the same humor as I do.
“Thanks,” she says as I hand her the glass of wine.
I sit down in the corner of the couch as she leans back into me. The bond that we share has only grown tighter through the years. She’s always been so honest with me; she’s an open book. I try to be just as open as she is with me, but there are some things that are just too difficult to admit—even to myself—but she’s my family. She’s the one person I know I can always depend on to be there for me because she always has been.
“So what’s Kimber up to tonight?” I ask.
As she scoots around to get comfortable, she tells me, “She’s at home with some of her girlfriends just hanging out.”
“You’re so anti-social,” I tease with a soft laugh.
“No, I’m not,” she responds with mock defensiveness and pinches my side when she continues, “I’m here with you, aren’t I?”
“You’re either with me or Kimber. That’s it.”
Shifting to her side, she sets her glass down on the coffee table and inches her way down on me, laying her head on my lap.
“Her friends are annoying. And you know I don’t really like being around a whole bunch of people anyway.”
“I know. I’m just giving you a hard time, sweetie,” I say quietly, knowing that this is how she’s always been.
“Plus, I spent the other evening with Kaleb.”
I laugh at her, and joke, “Your date that you didn’t even like? That hardly counts.”
“It counts,” she tries to defend, but it’s lost on me.
Finishing my beer, I set the bottle next to her glass and slide down so we are face to face. “So, what was it about this one that you didn’t like?”
“We just didn’t have anything in common.”
“You say that about all of them.”
Letting out a sigh and closing her eyes, she says, “I know. I just . . . I have a hard time looking at guys that way.”
“You wanna know what I think?” I ask, and she opens her eyes to look at me again. “I think you don’t know how to accept or give affection because you’ve never had it. Your parents never gave it to you, therefore you never learned how to give it.”
“But I accept it from you,” she whispers.
“You do, but I don’t think you view me as someone who would ever hurt you.”
Candace looks down for a minute before returning to my eyes. “Is that a bad thing?”