“Baby,” I said raising my arms out to the side of me, “if I haven’t made her want c**k at this point, you know she’s muff for life.”
Perry laughed and rolled her eyes while Rebecca hissed, “Dex!” in my ear, continuing to pull me backward until I was surrounded by a bunch of collegiate drunk idiots trying to both dance and rock out to Dave Grohl.
I scoffed at them. “You think this is rock?”
“Dex,” Rebecca warned again. “You can’t dance to anything heavier than this.”
“I dunno,” I said, taking her hands in mine as if we were preparing to waltz. “I think I can dance to anything. It’s why God gave me feet.”
“Please don’t tell me what else God gave you,” she groaned.
I laughed. “You know me too well.”
She smiled but her eyes had turned serious. “I do. So when are you going to do it?”
I gasped in mock surprise. “My dear Rebecca, did you lure me to the dance-floor under false pretences?”
“Of course,” she said. She nodded subtly to a blonde chick waiting at the bar. “If I wanted to dance with someone properly, I would have asked that woman over there.”
“She’s nice. Big boobs, full ass. You and I have similar tastes.”
She grunted. “Come on, Dex, I’m serious.”
“So am I.”
She kicked my leg. Her pointy shoes should come with a hazardous warning.
“Hey, ow,” I scowled at her. “I was recently a human carving board, remember?’”
“Hey, Dex. When are you going to do it?” she asked again.
It was my fault. I’d been stupid enough to let Rebecca in on my secret. I was regretting it now, but I had really needed her opinion.
“I don’t know,” I told her honestly, my eyes drifting over to Perry who was drinking at the table, looking comfortable and happy. “Not for a while. I’ll know when the time is right.”
Rebecca grinned and squeezed my hands. “I’m so excited. You’re going to get married!”
“Shut it,” I warned her, giving her a biting look. “I haven’t asked yet and she hasn’t accepted.”
“But you bought the ring today, didn’t you?”
I nodded. It was burning a hole in my f**king pocket as we spoke. After Perry and I had gone to see Jimmy, we went back to the apartment. I excused myself saying that I had to go get my car insurance renewed (which was true) and that I’d be right back. I ended up going to this jeweler just outside of town, one that specialized in vintage baubles. The generic diamond bullshit wasn’t fit for my Perry. I didn’t want chicks asking her how many carats it was or how much I paid. I had the money—it was just no one’s business.
The ring was from the sixties, made of white gold, and honestly couldn’t be more perfect. Naturally there were a few diamonds, but they acted as accents and flanked a center stone thingy of red and yellow. Ruby and yellow topaz—my birthstone and hers.
I wanted to show it to Rebecca in person, but I was too terrified to take it out in public, so the best she got was a quick photo from my phone after I purchased it from the overjoyed Croatian man. I erased the photo right after and when I got back to the house, Perry made me go on a walk with her and Fat Rabbit. Right after that Rebecca wanted to do drinks so we could discuss our business proposition. I didn’t have the time to take it out of my pocket and hide it somewhere, so there it was. At least it was in the tiny change pocket in my jeans, a place I could barely fit my fingers.
“I hope I’m a bridesmaid,” Rebecca said. “Oh, you’re going to have an amazing wedding. I can’t wait to start planning this. The bridesmaid dresses have to be amazing, I know this perfect tailor in Bellevue who could do it.”
And then Rebecca was babbling and babbling about the wedding. I didn’t hear a thing until the song ended. I shot her an apologetic smile and marched straight to Perry, holding my hand out to her.
“Care to dance, m’lady?” I asked.
Perry smiled sweetly and put her dainty hand in mine. I closed my fingers over it and choked back on a sudden lump in my throat. Soon. Soon I would be on my knees doing this.
Asking for her hand in marriage.
She got up and I brought her to the dance floor, pulling her body close to mine. I don’t even know what song was playing. It didn’t matter.
All that mattered was us.
Me and the future Mrs. Dex Foray.
THE END