“Well…I was kind of tired of my life,” she said, tiptoeing around the real problem. “I told my boyfriend that I was in Paris with my family for the summer, and I told my family that I was staying in St. Louis with my boyfriend. Then, I called Hadley and hopped on the first train here. I needed to get away. There were too many things I couldn’t take anymore. Sometimes, I feel like I was just being melodramatic about the whole thing, like maybe it wasn’t as bad as it seemed.”
Before speaking, Garrett seemed to consider what she had said. “So, you think you’re having these dreams because you ran away?”
“Maybe. I don’t know,” she said, not wanting to be any less vague.
“It must not have been easy to get on a train like that. I don’t know if I could do it,” he said, looking at her admirably. “Sometimes, I wish I could.”
“You?” she asked, not hiding her shock. “Why would you want to leave this?”
He laughed bitterly. “For someone so smart, you aren’t terribly perceptive, are you?”
She shook her head. “Never have been.”
“I have my own demons that I’d be happy to run from. My father, for one,” Garrett said, resting back heavily into the sofa.
Devon wondered then what she hadn’t wondered before. Perhaps his life and the perfect relationship she had thought he had with Hadley…wasn’t as perfect as she had suspected. He didn’t know about Hadley’s drug use—that much she was sure of. But how much of that put a rift in their relationship?
“He’s controlling and demanding. He doesn’t see me for who I am. He doesn’t care about anything that I care about. He doesn’t even like Hadley,” he said heavily.
“How could anyone not like Hadley?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I’m not sure. He just doesn’t think she’s good enough for me,” he said. “What he means is that she doesn’t have enough money.”
“But she has a wonderful job,” Devon broke in, feeling like she needed to defend her friend.
Garrett shook his head. “Old money. Status. Prestige. She’s from small town Missouri,” he said as if this was sufficient explanation.
Devon understood then. She had dealt with prejudices her entire life. She could see the weight on Garrett’s shoulders as he fought for the girlfriend he wanted, and the strain it had put on Hadley because she felt she would never be able to live up to it. As Devon recalled the first time she had stepped foot into the apartment, she understood the statement Hadley had made about Garrett going to his dad’s. Devon hadn’t realized how anxious Hadley had looked until now.
Devon’s parents sometimes acted like that, and she thought it was ridiculous. Her family had lived in Nashville for as long as Devon could even remember. Old Southern money was a privilege that afforded a person more luxuries than just status. Devon had taken it for granted a lot in her life. She knew the pros and cons of that lifestyle. She could empathize with what Garrett was going through.
“I’ve been there,” she said, reaching out to him and resting her hand on his. “My parents are like that sometimes.”
“Thanks,” he said, shrugging like he didn’t want to talk about it any longer.
It was sure easier to talk about him than her. This conversation did seem to strike a bond that Devon couldn’t shake.
“Sorry for changing the topic. I was trying to help you out with your dreams,” Garrett said.
Devon smiled. “I think you helped.”
“Yeah?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.
“Yeah, I think so. It was…nice to talk about it and get it off my chest,” she said.
“I hope you sleep better now. I think you have too many good things going for you to keep you from waking up in tears from your dreams. Maybe getting away from everything is exactly what you needed.” He turned his hand over and squeezed hers gently.
“Maybe it is,” Devon said.
She wished she could believe it as easily as he had said it.
Chapter Thirteen - Filling the Darkness
DARKNESS HADN’T YET fallen on the Chicago summer evening. The weather was muggy after the series of storms that had dotted the horizon the past week. When Devon had visited the Navy Pier earlier in the week, waves had been crashing so hard that she had been forced to leave. Thankfully, the rain was holding off for now as she teetered down the street in her impractical high heels and form-fitting dress.
The club was supposedly just around the block, but Devon wasn’t familiar with this neighborhood. She wished she had taken Garrett’s offer and went with him and Hadley when they left a little later, but things were at a standstill with Hadley. She wasn’t giving any ground, and anytime Devon had tried to push, Hadley would close off completely. Devon was hoping that tonight would be a good starting point to rebuild their relationship.
She double-checked the GPS on her phone to make sure she was going in the right direction. She took the next right and then found what she was looking for about halfway down the street. It was kind of a small, seedy-looking place. The only indication that it was a club was the unlit sign that read Open Mic Tonight.
As she walked into the place, she immediately felt overdressed. No one had told her what to wear for this, and she was too used to the music clubs back home. She always used to dress up to watch performances. Sometimes, even big names would show up out of nowhere to drink and play their favorite tunes. Devon didn’t think this was that kind of place.
Devon paid the cover charge and walked into the main seating area. When she entered, eyes followed her around the bar, and she immediately became self-conscious. She didn’t think she looked that great tonight, but the men here appeared ready to eat her alive. It was a discomforting sort of feeling, especially since Garrett and Hadley wouldn’t be here for a little while. She scanned the crowd, hoping to see someone she knew.
The room was set up in a flat-tiered fashion with four to eight tables on each tier that formed a semi-circle around a small stage. A single microphone and a beat-up wooden chair were the focal point. A black curtain hung against the back wall as the only decoration. The room was dimly lit and clouded with smoke.
Devon craned her neck, looking around. She knew other people from work were supposed to be here. Most of them didn’t like her because she was the new girl, but it would be better to sit with them than to sit alone. She was pretty sure she recognized someone when she felt a hand grab her ass. She squeaked in surprise and whipped around faster than she probably should have in her heels.