“Really?” Flem asked with nearly crossed eyes.
“Well, not as drunk as her,” I amended as I threw a thumb Lump’s way.
“That’s because we are all the same drunk, so you feel sober,” Claire helped.
The logic was good on that one. Which meant, we were all going to hate our lives tomorrow.
Directly after that thought, William grabbed me, picked me up, and threw me over his shoulder. My dress went flying. I was bounced and jostled, then set down in a seat, at an empty table, a million feet from the dance floor.
“Stay here!” William shouted in my face. He looked mad.
I hope he’s not mad at me!
Lump was set down next to me a second later, trailed by a stumbling Flem.
“I was just carried by your boyfriend,” Lump said with a hazy smile. “Fuck Jess, I am totally wasted. What did you put in those drinks?”
“Alcohol. You got hit in the face, did you know?”
“No, did I? Shit. Did I hit him back?”
“I have no idea.”
“Think so,” Flem mumbled, aiming her butt for the seat next to us, missing mostly, catching the edge then falling in a heap to the ground.
We wheezed out a laugh.
Instead of trying again, Flem continued to lay where she fell. She said, “You got him. Or one of ‘em. Bloody lip.”
“That all?” Lump asked, putting her head on the table.
“I couldn’t focus for any longer than that. I pro’ly need some water. Fuck! Open bars are a bad‘dea. Did I not tell you? Did I not say we needed p’ram’ters?”
“You are always right Flem, yes. Let’s go home,” I said.
I got up with one thing in mind: home. Need to go home. Drunk. Need bed.
It was then that I noticed a giant boxing match on the dance floor. Fists were swinging, bodies wrestling. Through my addled brain, I saw William in the thick of it, holding onto some guys hair and throwing punches.
“William’s fighting. S’not good,” I said to no one in particular.
My favorite bouncer rushed past, dragging someone out. Another group shot past him, yelling and screaming. More people fighting on the dance floor.
“This is a shit show,” I reflected, still to no one in particular. “But I gotta go home.”
“Wait for Jillie, Wess,” Lump mumbled into the table top.
“Why does no one else call him William?” I asked, sitting back down because the exit was blocked by another fight, this time with Adam and Ty in the thick of it.
“Because of how his eyes get all soft when you say it,” Flem said from the floor. “It’s gross. Also, it seems like that name is reserved just for you. Everyone says he is over-the-moon about you, you know. That he is totally pu**y whipped, and doesn’t care.”
“Hog wash.” I dropped my head to the table with a thunk. “He gives as good as he gets.”
“They think you rule the roast.”
“Roast?” Lump said, raising her head. “Do you have food? I’m hungry.”
“They don’t blame him, though, from what I’ve heard,” Flem continued. She was talking to herself at this stage. Or just talking because she forgot to shut up. “Fools. But you’re good. You’re a good friend. Probably a great girlfriend to him. Willie sees it. We see it. Still, y’all are gross.”
“Yeah,” I said. “I need to go home.”
I stood up again. I needed my purse. Purse had cab money.
William. Shit. I needed to grab him, too.
I stumbled off toward the far stairs in search of my hand bag, only to be stopped by two giant paws.
“Hands off Daniel-son, or my drunk friend Lump will kick you,” I yelled at the guy blocking my way.
“Jessica, where you goin’?”
I pointed at the floor. “Oh, hello, Adam. I see you wore your old ass boots for a night out. Not that I’m commenting. I need my handbag, my William, and my bed. Drunk.”
“Okay, we’ll grab those things. Willie is just wrapping things up. You gotta go sit down with the rest of the gir—oh shit. Now, where the hell are they goin’?”
“Potty mouth.” I turned.
Lump and Flem, leaning on each other again, were heading for the door. Home.
“Those bitches!”
“Jess, are you alright?”
It was Moose with a scratch on his cheek.
“No! Those whores are planning to just walk out of here without my expensive handbags! Last time they borrow from me, I will tell you that!”
“Moose, round up them girls and get ‘em to the booth,” Adam said. “Get that girl Lump to organize it. She’s drunk, but she’ll get everyone set. I’ll get this one. Willie will hang us if something happens to her.”
“I am not a freaking piece of luggage Adam!” I yelled.
The last thing I heard, before Adam scooped me up, was Moose chortling with laughter. Ass!
Chapter Twelve
Some indiscriminate amount of time later, Lump and I were walking through the packed bar on our way out of the club. Before then, all the girls, Moose’s included, had been sitting, or in Claire’s case sleeping, at the booth where Moose, Adam and Ty put us. We were not allowed alcohol, for which I was thankful and Jane was pissed, but were given more water than our bladders could hold. Our jail sentence consisted of drinking water and making trips to the bathroom. It wasn’t very fun, but we were too drunk to do anything about it.
When we were given the green light by a bouncer to head outside to meet the boys, we stumbled our way through the still crowded club. All I heard on our way was, "I keep tellin'em we gotta get more bouncers! An older crowd used to come to this club and there weren't no trouble. With the remodel and this younger crowd, though, fulla piss 'n vinegar, this done keep happenin'. Soon no one’ll want to come here no more!" The bouncer shook his head angrily.
The cold bite of the evening air was a welcomed relief to the hot bar we were leaving. It cleared the head somewhat. I was still mighty drunk, but manageable. I wanted William, my warm bed, and sleep.
Maybe drunken sex. We’d see.
I was first outside, Lump right next to me, the rest behind. The bouncer let us out the door and told us it was a pleasure. We waved as we walked, not caring. A second later Lump was grabbed from the right. All I saw were two hands reaching for her before she whirled around with her arms doing very confusing things, then stepping back to me after the other person’s presence was gone and their weight thrown off in the opposite direction.
A second later a stunned, yet frustrated, Adam stepped back toward us. He probably made a mental note to stop touching Lump all together.
Candace rushed to him, Jane and Claire after, and Flem was looking all around her like she suddenly landed on the moon.
“You know,” she was slurring, “the Texas I remember was much safer, with more reputable guys. But then, I wasn’t this hot.” She chuckled to herself. “Good thing L.A. has a bunch of pansies.”
“Flem, are you ready or what?” Jane shouted.
“Sorry. I was reflecting.”
“Well reflect your drunk arse ‘tis way. I want out of this fecking place!” Claire shouted.
“Adam, where’s William?” I asked too loudly.
“He is talkin’ to the manager. There is the bill to settle, plus he is putting in a complaint. Doubt we’ll come here again.”
“Jessica.” It was Moose standing with his girlfriend. Ty stepped around him, moving toward a still crying Candace. “We’re going to head out. See you tomorrow for the party?”
“Sunday. It’s on Sunday.”
“Shit, right. Tomorrow; somewhere calm then? For drinks?”
“Good times. See you.”
Ty gave me a hug, then he folded Candace in his arms. I had a quick thought that life would be so simple if all that happened was a forced peep show. I immediately felt bad. I still thought I should say something, though, to calm her down.
“Candace,” I said, “I know you think you were defiled, and it totally sucks, but some men are ass**les, and this stuff happens. I once had my entire dress pulled down around my ankles by some prick. The bouncers put him in a head-lock and he peed himself. He got what he deserved, but I was still humiliated.
“All anyone remembered the next weekend was the dude that peed himself. Next weekend here, all people will remember will be the three idiots that got beat the f**k up and kicked out. You won’t be in that recipe.”
I thought I sounded pretty good. Dr. George was something.
Ty squeezed her. She nodded to me, sniffing. “I was just so scared,” she said, and started crying again. “But I should listen to you. You’ve been in worse.”
Yeeeeaaaaaahhhhh. I didn’t really want to talk about me. I wanted to talk about her. It was time to go.
I hugged her and Ty together and watched them head away. It was when I turned back to ask where we were supposed to go that I realized no one was in sight. Well, no one I knew. All my friends were gone. Vanished. Without me.
“Where the hell did everyone go?” I asked to air.
“Right here sweet thang.”
It was some wanker walking with some other wanker. Two ugly ones at that.
“Eh. Just FUCK OFF, please. Can men just leave me alone FOR ONE SECOND? One Goddamn second? Christ!”
“What’s up with you? PMS?”
“Is your name PMS? ‘Cause if so, yes, that is the problem!”
Yes, I was having a tantrum. But where the hell was everyone? I know where the wanker went—away. He was smart. I was not in a great mood at being all alone in a parking lot.
I wandered around that spot for about ten minutes. Well, I was drunk. It very well might have been an hour. It also might have been a moment. My eyes were too blurry to read the clock on my phone, so it was left up to my best guess.
Ten minutes it was.
I finally decided that homeward bound would have to happen sooner or later, and dug in my handbag for my wallet. Only to realize I had someone’s else’s handbag, and there was no cash or credit cards. It was a club wallet, and all monetary possessions were probably on her person. That didn’t help me, who kept all my monetary possessions in my boyfriend’s pockets, since he had some, or in my freaking handbag that was not here!
Okay, fine. I could get a ride to Gladis, and beg for some money from her. Someone was always up at ungodly hours at her house. They were old; they had to pee a lot.
Just as I was waving my hand at a passing cab, and avoiding the cat calls of another groups of drunk, aimless men, a black limousine came screaming into the parking lot. The door opened and William hurriedly got out, followed by a few heads of my friends.
Oh. William got us a limo. That’s cool.
Here’s what wasn’t cool—they forgot me. Nice to know I was so forgettable by the man that insisted I trust him.
“Jessica, I am so sorry. Everyone thought you were in.”
“Right.”
“I’m so sorry. Please Jess, I am so sorry!”
He came up to hug me. I gave him a straight arm and walked to the limo without a glance.
I got in the limo and waved away the apologies. The moody treatment, which was my intended retribution, needed not hear apologies. It fed on indifference. I had a feeling this was going to sting even more tomorrow. It was slightly funny now, but probably wouldn't be slightly funny when I really thought about it. The moody treatment would do just fine.
I didn't hear much of the conversation on the way back. We stopped at Gladis’s house first, and then Adam would take the limo to his house. I had decided that tonight I would stay the night on my own. It wasn't punishment for being forgotten, so much, as just a need to wake up with a hangover and misgivings on my own. I just needed a night away for once. Plus, I had all the girls, and it was better to leave it as all the girls.
The girls got out and stumbled for the door, arguing and causing a ruckus, though trying to be quiet. I waited for them to get half way before I turned to William, who was waiting to go with me to my place.
"William, maybe not tonight." I was slurring, but I was understandable.
"Not stay with you tonight, you mean?”
"Yeah, maybe just not tonight." I was being slightly moody, so he got the hint, but we hadn't been apart since, well, we got together, so I didn't want to lay it on too thick. I did still love the guy.
He started to say something, but stopped himself. He nodded once and tried to hide the look of hurt that crossed his face. My heart twisted.
"You'll keep Fred with you?" he asked softly.
It was my turn to nod.
He moved my hair over my shoulder and traced his fingers along my jaw line. I could tell he was debating kissing me—wondering if I was mad enough to refuse. In that second I decided I kind of was. I mean, dude left his girlfriend behind after a huge fight, in a dark parking lot, at the club. Kind of a big deal.
Making the decision for him, I yelled good-night to Adam. I said good-night to William, ignored the unjustified hurt on his face, turned on my heel, and headed to the house. I conjured up a good, fast stride with head held high, trying to wipe away all the drunk so William knew it was a conscious decision to walk away, but that dang Fred ruined everything. He was trained to stay out of sight until the property was breached, and had probably been frolicking with the girls, so I’d forgotten all about him. Then the big bugger was running at me in a full sprint. He gave me a playful, though fast, nudge, expecting me to squeal and pet him. The dog might have a good idea of my mood, but he didn’t have a clue when I was trying to look moody and unaffected!